


War of Illusion

by sageclover61



Series: Legerdemain [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Archangels, Big Brother Lucifer, Big Brother Michael, Gen, I don't know who Gabriel is, I guess he just gets to be himself, Lucifer is Samuel Winchester, Lucifer is a Good Big Brother, Mentions of Suicidal Thoughts, Michael is Dean Winchester, Michael is a good big brother, Non consensual stasis, Protective Gabriel, Protective Raphael, Raphael is Adam Milligan, Reincarnation, for the purpose of putting someone to sleep against their will, misuse of grace
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-10
Updated: 2018-10-01
Packaged: 2019-06-25 08:25:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 27,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15636933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sageclover61/pseuds/sageclover61
Summary: Michael would never have turned on Lucifer. Not under any circumstances ever, especially not for an absent father who had no care for the feelings of his children. So he and Lucifer fled, leaving illusions behind in their wake as they tore out their grace, choosing humanity over the supposed heavenly plans for paradise. It wouldn’t be paradise if one of them was permanently dead and one of them had to spend eternity without their other half.Gabriel, sickened by the deaths of his siblings over a war initiated by illusions, fled heaven himself when no one, not even Raphael, would listen to him. Finding the human brothers his siblings had become hadn’t been intentional, but he protected them nonetheless. He would do so for aeons.Raphael would spend aeons regretting the decisions he made while living in the shadow of a war mongering illusion. He would regret causing Gabriel to flee, among other things, and in the end, he would leave in search of his own redemption.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [UmbraeCalamitas](https://archiveofourown.org/users/UmbraeCalamitas/gifts).



> This is a tumblr prompt fill for Talkingtomselfagain. The prompt was for a story in which Lucifer was not the only one to rebel in the beginning, and that Michael helped Lucifer leave, leaving behind illusions in their place that fooled the entire host, with the exception of Gabriel. I tend to go a little overboard where Raphael is concerned, so he stole the show. I enjoyed writing every word.
> 
> This could not have been written without @Hyrulehearts1123, or @ThallenCambricaltran. These two betas tossed ideas around, and wrote some of the sections themselves. Any errors left are mine, and if you recognize it, I don't own it.
> 
> @LilithPrime provided any enochian used in this story.

_ “Lucifer has gotten out of hand. If you don’t put him into the cage, I’ll have to put him down. You don’t want to make me do that, right, Michael?” _

 

Michael had heard those words from his father’s mouth only that morning and he couldn’t make them stop reverberating through his grace. The ultimatum was clear. As far as Father was concerned, he had two choices. He could cast his brother so far into Hell that it was Limbo, into a cage He had built with the sole intention of isolating Lucifer away from his brethren in perfect silence for the first time in his whole life. Time moved faster in Hell than it did in either Heaven or on Earth, but it moved even faster in Limbo. He was sure that Father intended for Lucifer to stay there for millions of Earth years.  _ That would translate into millions of centuries in the Cage.  _ That was unacceptable. The other option was some kind of battle here and now that would certainly end with Father, or worse, Michael himself,  _ killing _ Lucifer. Which was also  _ wrong. _ Why would Father ask that of him? As some arbitrary test of faith, like Abraham and Isaac? It had worked out for Abraham, but that didn’t mean it would work out for him. Or more importantly,  _ for Lucifer. _

No. Michael could not bear the thought of locking his little brother away or killing Lucifer, whether that was now or at the end of time. That meant he would have to find another solution. One that would fool Father and all of his siblings.

Michael found a solution. It hurt that he would have to fool Gabriel and Raphael, but he couldn’t chance it getting back to their suddenly absent Father that Michael, the most obedient son, had disobeyed. Did Father make himself scarce because he couldn’t bear the shame he thought Lucifer had brought on himself? Or couldn’t stand to watch the consequences of his actions? Michael didn’t care, because the sudden absence made it all the easier to cast his illusions. Raphael and the rest of the host were already sure of what would come, therefore the most difficult to convince of the deceit would be Gabriel.

Gabriel had always been Lucifer and Michael’s shadow. Gabriel had an affinity for pranks and illusions, so the MorningStar himself had taken Gabriel under his wing. When he had not been busy, Michael had joined in. He was not all hard work and no play, he just took his responsibilities more seriously then it sometimes seemed like the other two did.

Maybe Michael could have put more effort into his masterful illusions. Maybe he didn’t anticipate Gabriel’s tenacity. Maybe Gabriel’s eye for illusions was all by design because perhaps what had been prophesied to occur was not what He really wanted. Either way, Michael made the necessary illusions, gave them their necessary commands, and explained his plan, in great detail and with great haste, to Lucifer and his little brother agreed.

Michael flew with Lucifer to Earth, orchestrating his illusions to begin their elaborate dance to cover their elusive escape. It hurt to hear the mourning in the Host’s choir in the aftermath, but Michael had seen no other possible solution that did not end with Lucifer’s banishment and eventual death. He had made his choice. Lucifer was reticent, but he conceded into letting Michael store his grace safely away. Lucifer had already given the Mark to Cain, but there was a reminder of the terrible darkness still attached to Lucifer’s grace. As Michael added his own grace to the stone, that darkness filed into it, unattached to the grace of either angel.

Back in heaven, Gabriel was not so easily fooled by the imperfect images Michael had skillfully crafted. He knew his brothers better than any of the other angels and while he would never admit this even to himself for fear of hubris, he knew his closest siblings even better than Father did.

The fighting between Michael and Lucifer became real in a way that it never had before. The Michael he had chased through Heaven with Lucifer would never cast his little brother out. Not for anything. There was no time for Gabriel to confront the illusions because the real Michael and the real Lucifer used the confrontation between the two illusions to make their escape and Gabriel was forced into a combat that wasn’t even real and he hated it.

In the aftermath, the visage of Michael locked himself away in Heaven’s depths, to be disturbed by no one because he claimed he required solitude as he sought revelation. The highest ranking seraphim bought the story and spread it around. Time had no meaning to them, if Michael wanted to spend aeons seeking revelation, who were they to interrupt him?

Gabriel went to Raphael. Surely his other older brother would know what to do, if this Michael and the Lucifer he had cast into limbo weren’t real? Where was Father? Where were the real Michael and Lucifer? Why had they left? But Raphael wouldn’t  _ listen _ . He waved Gabriel’s concerns aside, insisted that Gabriel was seeing things and that this was exactly what Father wanted. That Lucifer was being justly punished for his disobedience and that Michael had made the right decision because he was the obedient son and that everything had gone perfectly and that someday, when it was time, there would be an apocalypse and father would come back and they would all go to paradise. And it made Gabriel sick,  _ because following that story, Lucifer would not go to paradise because he would be really really dead. _

So the Messenger did the only thing he could. He left heaven. He knew Michael and Lucifer had left, so all he had to do was find them and their grace and then restore them.  _ Except, what would that solve? They’d all be back in the same scenario the eldest archangel had been trying to avoid by this game of illusion. _ So no. He had to do something else instead. But what?

It didn’t end up mattering. Not really. It took many a human year for Gabriel to find his brothers, but eventually, he did. They'd been reborn as a set of twins, and wasn't that ironic. This tribe of humans was polytheistic, which was even more ironic, not that it mattered at all. Gabriel protected his human-born older brothers. He became a Trickster pagan in the process purely by accident.  _ All the more tricks with which to protect them with. It wouldn’t do to accidentally reveal his presence to the host. _

They died eventually, and were reborn as another set of brothers and Gabriel protected them. When they died, the cycle continued. Gabriel would find and protect his eldest brothers regardless of who they ended up reborn as. He did this for millennia. It never occurred to the Messenger turned Trickster that perhaps he should look for their grace. If he did so, he would be circumventing their wishes. _It didn’t matter that he would circumvent anyone’s wishes, including Father’s. He would not do anything that might restart the battle with Heaven._ _This was his witness protection. Protecting the_ real _Michael and Lucifer and hiding both them and himself from heaven._

The Archangel of Justice never saw any sign of his brothers’ grace. He knew that angels could cut their own grace out and that it was an essence of creation. Caused creation. An archangel’s grace would have only had a far greater impact. And yet there had been no signs that any unusually large quantity of Creation had been kickstarted. Whatever Michael had done, because only the greatest strategist could have done it, he had done it well.

__  
  


In retrospect, Gabriel would lament that he really should have realized that something had changed. He should have had the foresight to know that it would change and taken actions to safeguard against it. But there was no anticipating who his brothers would be reborn as and he had been cut off from celestial planning since he had left heaven.

Gabriel knew that Heaven intended Samuel and Dean Winchester to be the vessels of the Michael and Lucifer they didn’t know were still illusions, even eons after their creation by the real Michael. He kept an eye out for them, even as he didn’t know yet where his own brothers had been reborn again.

And in their childhood, an amulet came into the possession of one brother by the hands of the other and the archangel had no idea what it was. He had feelings associated with it, not quite premonitions of future comings. A strong feeling that _ this would be it _ , but no hint as to why he felt that way. Because there was no way to prevent the illusions from taking their vessels? How hard could dispelling Michael’s last work of magic possibly be? Sure, the illusions had lasted for aeons, but with no direction or power source, shouldn’t they have lost power since then?

But what took Gabriel two decades to figure out was that they were also just another reincarnation of his eldest brothers. He figured out who Samuel Winchester was when he chose his need and desire for freedom over his father’s plans for him. And the plans of the rest of the host.  _ Just like Lucifer, all those many many aeons ago. _

Not that the Trickster could blame the youngest hunter. If Gabriel could have given John Winchester his just desserts without bringing Celestial Wrath down on himself, he would have.  _ It was his duty to protect his brothers while they could not protect themselves _ and he took it  _ very _ seriously.

__  
  


As fate would have it, the Winchesters were reunited and returned to their habits of hunting anything that wasn’t human. Anything that would hurt or hunt humans. Gabriel kept an eye on them, but he also occupied himself with giving humans their just desserts.  _ He was the Archangel of Justice, after all.  _ He may not have been as religious about his duties as others were, but he could hardly be accused of being derelict in his responsibilities.

Being “hunted” by the Winchesters was intentional. Gabriel knew Sam and Dean were Lucifer and Michael respectively, and he missed them. If they were hunting him, he could at least keep a better eye on them. However, he could hardly waste  _ all _ their time that way. He respected their desire to protect and save the world. It was inspirational. _ If only they knew the half of it. _ But he wasn’t going to tell them. He had never, in any of their lifetimes, told them who they really were. If Michael or Lucifer had intended to remember, they would not have made their transition to human so thorough. He would respect that as much as he could, as long as it didn’t endanger them.

The ‘hunt’ was enlightening. He got to see his brothers in their element and he got to rile them up. Pranking them was so easy! Sam treated his laptop like a bible and Dean could have married his car. It wasn’t anything like being with his brothers though.  _ Games with Michael and Lucifer had been more relaxed. No one would have believed it, but there was tension here that never existed in their childhood. This was tainted with Gabriel’s knowledge that the Host wanted the Winchesters for less-than-righteous purposes and that this would end. Maybe today. Maybe tomorrow. They were fragile humans, as they were now. The Michael and the Lucifer that weren’t even real, they would kill these two humans. Maybe not literally, but it would contaminate, erase, what his real siblings stood for, who they were. These two humans were more like his real siblings than any of the prior reincarnations and more like his real siblings than two fake images had the capacity to emulate even if they wanted to.  _ They didn’t.

It was outside help that ended his game. Somehow, this  _ human _ , knew more about his brothers than he did. He had to let them think they killed him, because he had sworn to himself that he would never stand in their way. They might have been fragile humans, but they were still his eldest brothers and he would protect them to his dying breath, but he would not protect them by taking their freedom. He would not stoop to those levels.  _ If he could help it. _

Gabriel laid low after that. He stayed out of sight, but he didn’t stop keeping an eye on the Winchesters. Word on the grapevine was that demons were stirring. That was not the unusual part. The unusual part were the names:  _ Lilith, Alastair, and the Yellow-Eyed demon no one could name.  _ Gabriel didn’t know any Yellow-Eyed demons. But he knew the first two. He understood enough about Hell’s hierarchy that he knew this was bad.  _ It was coming. _

And then Cold Oak happened.  _ Gabriel tried to get in and intervene, but the whole place was covered in sigils. There were even sigils preventing his entrance and he tried to get in anyway. But then Sam Winchester was dead and Gabriel had almost retrieved his soul from Heaven when Dean Winchester went over the edge, tying the archangel’s hands.  _ He could have resurrected Sam without condemning Dean’s soul, but there was nothing even one as strong as he could do about a Demon Deal made at a crossroads.  _ Not a deal held by Lilith herself. _

Gabriel did not try to delude himself.  _ He knew  _ exactly _ what was intended to happen.  _ So much effort had gone into this and he knew  _ exactly _ where all the orders had come from. Two illusions were following the script written for them as though God himself was pulling the strings.  _ It had been a long time since Gabriel had seen him as Father. He had run away from his responsibilities as though his children were broken toys to be discarded at his leisure. Humans had been the bright and shiny new toy and when Lucifer had pointed out the poor paint job, He was determined to never see or speak to him again. Any of them. Michael had been the obedient son, up until the point where God told him to hurt his twin. Why had God expected any answer other than no? Even an incredibly deluded Michael would never turn on his brother. And so he had crafted illusions that could do to each other what he could not do to his own. Illusions so skillfully crafted that if Gabriel didn’t do something they were going to destroy the world. _

Gabriel couldn’t _see_ see the future, but he did know that the Winchesters were bound and determined to recreate codependency. _Just like the original Michael and Lucifer who merely tolerated the baby shadow toddling in their footsteps._ _All the little shadows toddling after them. “Don’t step on that fish, Castiel. God has big plans for that fish.” A fish that died and turned into clay and was crafted into human form, but none of them knew that then. Only that they were not to touch it. All of the young angels were bright eyed and naive. They believed wholeheartedly that their Father was perfect and that he could make no mistakes. To think otherwise was sacrilege. There was no room for doubt or question. No room for mistakes. Or Free-Will, the most important difference between the mortals and the divine._ The real Michael and Lucifer were gone, and their illusions were incapable of understanding Father’s last command. “ _Love humans more than you love me.”_ Was someone making a choice when they decided their paradise was more important than the last command? Had the last command ever been given from the archangels who heard it to the rest of the choir? Gabriel didn’t know. He had no way to know.

The archangel considered setting up a time loop, but in the end, he couldn’t do it. The thought of Sam, Lucifer’s, expression if he had to watch his brother die over and over again was going to be pain and suffering and a sheer determination to fix it so strong that it would kill him. No lessons would be learned, Gabriel knew that. In another universe he might do it anyway because he would have been so far in denial that he’d actually think it would work, but not here.  _ Dean was going to die. There was no way he could prevent that.  _ It was certain that as soon as blood was shed, the first seal would break and someone would harrow Hell.  _ They’d need Michael’s true vessel back, after all.  _ Which meant that he had to keep Sam alive and in one piece until that happened and he couldn’t do that if Sam held a grudge for his killing Dean over and over and over again.

Gabriel kept an eye out for the demons released by the devil’s gate and an eye on the Winchesters. Being the hunters that they were, Sam and Dean Winchester would of course get right in the middle of it. It was his self-appointed duty to protect them, and he would do it well.

Dean’s demon deal was also an issue.  _ Of course Michael would do whatever it took to bring Lucifer back from the dead, no surprises there.  _ Let it not be said that the Winchesters didn’t have a flair for the dramatics. It must have run in the family. What happened if a fallen angel sold their soul? They’d been reincarnating since they’d cut out their grace, but did the deal override that? And what about the Seals to the Cage?  _ The Righteous Man must first spill blood in Hell, setting into motion the events that would allow the Cage to open. _

The archangel could only solve one problem at a time, and the first on the menu was the demon with a demon blade. It wasn't a _s if ingratiating herself to Sam could possibly end well._ He smote the demon minx before she could waltz into the room where Sam Winchester was surrounded by three of the seven deadly sins. She was probably doing it for emotional manipulation, but it was also possible that Sam would suspect him of doing it for that same reason.

That didn’t matter. What mattered was that Gabriel did everything he could to help his brothers, even if they didn’t remember who he was or trust him yet.

So Gabriel walked in and stabbed the three demons. It was really the best way to kill them. He was their guardian angel, but he couldn’t reveal that to them. He could just smite the demons or exorcise them from their hosts, but the vessels were dead already and what would that prove?

Sam blinked at Gabriel. “You’re not a Trickster.” His gaze shifted from Gabriel to the demons, then to the knife. “What are you really?”

Gabriel grinned. “You can call me Gabriel.” It was a fairly common name and saying just that much wouldn’t give anything away anyway.

“Like the archangel?” Sam raised an eyebrow, like he wanted to believe it but couldn’t bring himself to do so. It reminded Gabriel that Sam had always been devout in his belief of a higher power. During his childhood, Sam had regularly found time to pray to an absent deity. Never for anything specific, but because he believed in it. None of the prayers had been to Gabriel specifically, but as an Archangel, Gabriel could tune into any prayers he really wanted to hear, and it was easier still when he knew whose prayers he was listening for. Sam had been less dedicated after leaving for Stanford, but even now he still spared a moment every once in a while for a small prayer.

Gabriel gave Sam a small sad smile and he shifted to hold the knife by the blade, offering it towards Sam.

Sam took it. “Why are you giving me this? What is it?”

“It’s a demon killing blade,” the archangel replied. If he’d had more time, he would have figured out its composition and purpose, but this was more important. He only knew it wasn’t an angel blade. “It’ll serve you well, I think.”

Gabriel vanished with a flap of feathered wingbeats. He missed his brothers more in that moment than he had since they’d left heaven. This was why he wasn’t supposed to get too close.  _ Don’t reveal yourself and don’t tell them who they are. _

* * *

 

“So get this,” Sam said sometime later, pointing to a line in some obscure reference book. “I  _ know  _ Gabriel’s an archangel. Most of the lore just calls him an angel, but I  _ know  _ he’s an archangel.”

“What’s your point, Sam? Angels don’t exist.”

“There’s so much lore on them though! How can they not exist? All lore has a basis on something in reality, and there’s more lore on them than anything else put together! But anyways- Gabriel was God’s messenger, but! In the lore in which he’s an archangel, he was also the archangel of justice.”

“How does justice lend itself to Tricksters and Just Desserts? Killing people is not okay!”

“Dean…. We kill monsters that hurt people. We locate them by following a body count. How does that make us any different from the jury and executioner you’re accusing Gabriel of being?”

“They’re not human, Sam. None of them are human. That’s the problem!”

“Am I human, Dean? Am I really? And what about you? You sold your soul!”

“For you!”

Dean opened his mouth as if to go on a further tirade, but Sam stopped him. “No, Dean. For  _ you _ because  _ you _ couldn’t handle a life that didn’t have me in it. How do you think I feel about the prospect of life without  _ you _ ?”

“I… what?”

“You’re the only constant I’ve ever had in my life and now that you’ve gone and sold your soul for one more year with me, that’s all I have left!”

Dean blinked once, then again. He opened his mouth to say something, then closed it. They’d been raised to believe that what was dead should stay dead, but first John, then he, had made demon deals to bring back the dead. Did that invalidate their humanity? And Sam had a point. Some demon had bled into his mouth during his infancy. John had been of the mindset that Sam’s humanity was in question, but Sam tried to hard to be good. It wasn’t an argument he really felt like having though, and what else was he supposed to say? 

With a sigh, he glanced at the reference book Sam had yet to close. What he had been saying about that angel, Gabriel, all seemed familiar somehow, though he had no idea how. He had never had any interest in researching angels, especially since nothing had even tried to save his mother. Yet the words were familiar to him. But how? The more he thought about it, the more that it seemed like there was a name at the edge of his mind, one he wasn’t sure how he could know. “Does that book talk about a Michael?”

“Yeah!” Sam grinned at his brother, and Dean couldn’t help but be glad he’d asked. That was the expression he wanted on Sam’s face. The one where he’d just read something he found really interesting and was dying to share. “He’s the leader of heaven’s armies and the only angel almost every source can agree with him being an archangel. Some sources also claim he’s the archangel of justice, so it’s possible it’s a title he shared with Gabriel.”

“Why would there be two archangels of justice?”

“Michael’s duty first and foremost was related to being a ‘sword’. Although it’s unclear why he would  _ be _ a sword. I think that’s a translation error.”

“That doesn’t sound right,” Dean said, pondering the statement. “Is it a metaphor? Or did he have a big sword?” After careful consideration, he added another word. “Flaming?”

Sam looked down at the open page, then back at Dean. “How do you know that?”

“I’m not sure.” Dean’s voice was hesitant, guarded. It almost sounded like he wasn’t being honest, like he had a guess but didn’t want to hazard it.

Sam raised an eyebrow. “Are you sure? I think you know about it for the same reason I know Gabriel is an archangel, not a trickster.”

“And how was that?”

Gabriel blinked. He’s been watching the boys invisibly since they’d first mentioned his name. He’d wanted to know how they’d react to the knife, but had been busy nursing his homesickness. This was more interesting than a knife anyway. “Michael, you devious son of a bitch.”

Unseen and unbeknownst to either hunter, the amulet around Dean’s neck was pulsing slightly, a dark bronze hue emanating from its core. “You knew you’d be reborn as a Winchester,” Gabriel mused. That was the only explanation. He’d looked for the archangelic grace belonging to his brothers and he’d never seen a trace of it. Because it had been siphoned into an unassuming amulet that one brother gave to the other because he thought it was a protection charm.  _ It was so much more than that, even as it would protect Sam and Dean both. _ “You’re a scheming mastermind and I love you anyway.”

Gabriel left silently, so he missed the brief expression change on Dean’s face. The human looked thoughtful, and just for a moment, his eyes flashed the same hue as the amulet around his neck. “Thank you, Gabriel,” he whispered under his breath, a prayer more than a spoken gratitude. His tone conveyed more than just the words but genuine appreciation for the protection he’d never considered needing. But it wasn’t really a prayer and Gabriel never heard it because Dean’s eyes went back to normal, the bit of grace taking the sentiment with it.

Dean sat across from Sam. “So, tell me, were there any other archangels? I bet Michael and Gabriel needed someone to keep them out of trouble.”

“Someone to keep them out of trouble, and someone to get into it with. Let me tell you about…” Sam could have gone on forever, and Dean would have let him. Neither hunter noticed the content purr coming from the amulet, or the growl like a cat stalking prey.

* * *

The Winchesters continued hunting and Gabriel kept an eye on them when he could. Heaven was scrambling because they wanted Dean to break the first seal, but they also wanted him to say yes to Michael and Sam to Lucifer.

Sam was desperate to find a way to get Dean out of his deal. He killed every cross-road demon he could summon in an attempt to get a name or a hint, but none of the demons would tell him who held Dean’s contract, only that it wasn’t them. The demon killing blade came in handy, and Sam was glad that Gabriel had given it to him, but wished he knew why the not-Trickster had decided to do so. He couldn’t think of any ulterior motives for the being, but he also had to believe there was one.

Dean was really enthusiastic about celebrating Christmas and Sam just wanted to forget the holiday existed. Holidays had always been a sore spot in their childhood and doing all of the holiday things now didn’t feel right. It wasn’t their thing, and doing them all now wouldn’t suddenly make Dean’s deal any less likely to break. It even took time away from trying to fix this.

They finished the hunt involving the Hold Nickar pagan gods and Sam decided to decorate while Dean was out at the bar because it wasn’t worth fighting with Dean about it and the idea was sound. He’d been thinking a lot about the Christmas Dean had told him all the monsters were real and he’d given him the protection charm. It was the last Christmas he’d ever have with Dean. He should make an effort.

  
  
  


On Boxing Day, Sam and Dean did not wake up where they thought they were going to. It could have still been their hotel room, but even that seemed doubtful. The room was bright with lit candles and fairy lights. Sparkling confetti had been thrown around the room, which only added to the brightness and on top of the fairy lights, there were lights shaped like chili peppers hanging along the border of the room in green, blue, and and- was that pink?

The Christmas tree looked taller than it had before and was more lavishly decorated. The star on top was actually twinkling at them and some of the ornaments were changing colors.

“Why does it look like a unicorn puked in here?” Dean asked. “Sammy, did you get in a fight with something magical?”

“Rise and shine you muttonheads! You two are the most depressing lot I’ve ever dealt with, so we’re going to celebrate Christmas with some style!”

“Wake me up when the world makes sense.” Dean flopped back over on the bed.

“No you don’t!” Gabriel stepped into view, the widest grin on his face. “I made you two a fantastic Christmas breakfast, so you are going to feast!” He snapped, summoning or conjuring a table laden with eggnog and coffee, cinnamon rolls with extra frosting, bacon with sausage, and a bowl of fresh fruit.

Dean jumped up at the thought of a free meal. Especially one that smelled as good as this did. Caution won out in the end though, and he hesitated. “Wait, how do I know you haven’t poisoned it? Wouldn’t that be just desserts for gluttons?”

Sam sat up. “I don't think Gabriel would hurt us. And we’re not gluttons, so that wouldn’t fit a Trickster MO. Besides, he’s not a Trickster and yesterday was Christmas.”

“Do angels celebrate Christmas?” Dean asked, taking a seat at the table and pouring himself a cup of coffee.

Gabriel raised an eyebrow, but didn’t answer. They didn’t really know he was an archangel, this was just a continuation from Sam’s statement that one day. Instead of engaging he made a “hurry up” gesture at Sam. “Get up already! This beautiful food won’t eat itself!”

“Well that’s a relief,” Sam deadpanned. “We wouldn’t want any repeats of that one time.”

Gabriel had no clue what Sam was talking about. There hadn’t been any hunts involving food that ate itself. There hadn’t even been any sentient food. Except that one time when Lucifer was being weird and wanted to talk to the ambrosia. But that had ended when it got eaten by another piece of ambrosia. Did Sam remember that? Had it been written down at some point? He honestly didn’t know.

“Sam, that’s weird. Food doesn’t eat food,” Dean said. “Come eat, and stop thinking you’re being funny, ‘cause you’re not.”

Sam joined Dean at the table. The fresh fruit looked especially appealing. “Why are you here?” Sam directed to Gabriel. “Why kill some demons and give me a nice blade to kill them with? Why bring us Christmas decorations and food for Boxing Day? What’s the ulterior motive?” Gabriel opened his mouth to answer but Sam cut him off. “And cut the bull. Either you’re an archangel or you’re not. If you’re not, you’re playing with us and if you are, why the Hell are you dealing with us? Don’t you have god fearing civilians to guide and protect or whatever?”

Gabriel blinked and Dean glared aghast Sam, but the younger hunter didn’t back down. Not this time. He wanted, needed, to know what was going on. He remembered emotional anguish he couldn’t account for and while he wasn't entirely sure why he needed to,  _ he had to make sure it wouldn’t happen again. _

“I’m not going anywhere and I’m not playing any games.” Gabriel's voice was calm, even. Honest, but not bare. “You know who I am, what I am. But do you remember what you know?”

“No more Chick Flick moments before breakfast! Sammy, quit being a little bitch and eat this very delicious food.”

The little part of Sam’s brain that thought of itself as “Lucifer” calmed. Dean was satisfied and thought this was perfectly safe, so there was no reason for him to worry about it. He helped himself to some of the fruit and ceased his fussing.

Gabriel was honestly fascinated by the dynamic between Sam and Dean. It was evolved from the original Michael and Lucifer, but he could see the archangels in these reincarnations in ways he never had before. It wasn’t exactly like what he would have expected if his siblings had torn out their grace without being reborn or losing their memories, but it was closer than any other of their past lives. But their ignorance was clearly coming to an end as they started remembering things they had no other possible means of knowing,  _ and Gabriel had no idea how he felt about that.  _ There were many days he still missed his elder brothers so much it hurt. But he had to have their best interests come first. The question was, what was in their best interest? Returning their grace and memories, or suffering through more ignorant human reincarnations? Could he even safely make that decision for them?

Sam and Dean ate their breakfast in silence. Gabriel pecked at a cinnamon roll, but mostly mused on the lack of options. It had become a waiting game, but perhaps it had always been one and he’d never noticed. Raphael would know what to do, but he hadn’t even believed him about Michael and Lucifer’s illusions, so he would be of no use now.

Gabriel snapped the table gone when Sam and Dean were done eating. His intention had been to lighten the mood because the Winchesters were depressing, but so far he’d only managed to depress himself, too.

The Winchesters looked to Gabriel when the table disappeared. The archangel sighed. “Look, there’s nothing I can do about the demon deal. You didn’t ask, but surely you’ve thought it. I wanted to help provide some happy holiday memories because you two are far too depressing. But here I am becoming melancholic. So what do you say to some cheesy Christmas classics with popcorn candy canes, and spiked eggnog?”   
  
The boys agreed because you don’t tell a could-be archangel no. And there was free food. The first movie watched was “It’s a Wonderful Life”. They ate honeyed ham for lunch during the second movie and then snacked on popcorn balls Gabriel conjured. They stayed fresh and warm until they were devoured. They all drank eggnog, which kept itself refilled. By the third movie, Dean was slightly tipsy and Sam a little more so.   
  
“Thanks for this,” Sam said sometime during the last movie.   
  
The small smile Gabriel gave him was sad. Why was Gabriel such a sad person? He’d done that before, when he’d asked if Gabe was an archangel. Sam peering at the archangel, then behind him. Were there any wings back there?   
“Samoose,” Gabriel said, leaning towards the hunter. I don’t think you’re going to find whatever it is that you’re looking for back there.”   
  
“Not all that glitters is gold,” Sam mumbled.   
  
“Sure.” Gabriel glanced over at the other Winchester just as Dean let out a small snore. Had this been at all beneficial? Or was he merely tormenting himself with what he couldn’t have, shouldn’t crave?   
  
“You’re welcome,” Gabriel added. They needed this, they’d enjoyed it. It was impossible to say whether or not they would remember it, but the purpose was a day of rest.  Right now, this was all he was going to get. It would be enough because it had to be.   
  
“Thank you,” Sam repeated politely. He closed his eyes as he focused on the warm feeling in his belly. It was probably the alcohol, but for the first time in a while, it seemed like maybe there was a little hope after all.   
  
Gabriel watched the Winchesters drift off to sleep. He had arrangements to take care of. With a snap of his fingers, the Christmas decorations were gone and the Winchesters tucked safely into bed. Assured they wouldn’t see anything, he spread his wings and before taking flight, he looked. They had faded in his time away from Heaven, a pale yellow more than gold, but they were still coated in a semi-permanent metallic glitter of gold and silver that he’d never felt the urge to clean up. Lucifer had been born with wings of sparkly pink and at one time had decided that Gabriel’s should sparkle too. And Gabriel had liked it. He still did.

  
The archangel left with a single stroke of wings. He felt like a crumbling wall patched together with duct tape and band-aids. The Hell was he trying to achieve? He’d never been close to the earlier reincarnations. Why had he gotten so close and attached now? They weren’t going to take their grace back. They would die and reincarnate and cease to remember that he would die for them, and he would be left all alone again. He would protect them, but at what cost to himself?

* * *

It might have even been a good year for the Winchesters, minus the demon deal, except Lilith had a vendetta against Sam for killing Azazel. Right after New Years, someone called the FBI with a tip including their location. It was January second and Hendrickson arrested them.

“Time for you to die.” It wasn’t Nancy any more. The break in the salt let in something far nastier than Ruby would have been. Her eyes rolled back and instead of black like the majority of demons, or yellow like Azazel, these were white.

“My contract isn’t up yet!” Dean shouted.

“Mmm. Your brother thinks it’s open season on my crossroads demons and your contract is up when I say it’s up. I think now is good, don’t you?” She put two fingers to her mouth and whistled. They never saw the hellhound, but there was no way it could be anything else.

It happened faster than Sam could comprehend, one second Dean was standing, the next he was dropping to the ground, trying to fight against an unseen creature that was ripping his shirt, his chest, everywhere it could reach.

And then, within less than a blink, Dean was dead. “Dean!” Sam screamed, over and over and over again. At some point the cry was “Michael!” but he didn’t care.  _ His brother was dead and this time he’d never see him again because Demon Deals could interfere with their reincarnation, couldn’t they? _

Gabriel had no idea what to do. Yes, he would come back as soon as the seal broke, but how long would that take? Sam was screaming, but the name his soul called out for was different and Gabriel could hear it.

Gabriel appeared next to Sam, and the hunter looked warily over his shoulder. “Gabriel.” Sam stared and his eyes widened. “Gabriel!”

“I’m sorry about Dean,” Gabriel said sympathetically, not sure what else to say. Was now really the time to talk about seals?

“Michael,” Sam corrected, looking back at his brother mournfully. “I remember  _ everything _ .” Dean’s amulet hung from Sam’s clenched fist and his gaze shifted to it.

“Oh, Luci.” Gabriel waited for the shoe to drop, the one where Lucifer, Sam, got angry for his keeping everything a secret.

“Thank you for protecting us,” Sam said instead. “Maybe I should be angry that you never said anything, but Michael and I planned on never remembering.” He shifted towards Gabriel, then without warning, he spread his arms and launched himself into a bear hug around Gabriel.

Gabriel held Sam. This was the first time he’d hugged one of his siblings since he’d left home. It was just a shame it had to be on such depressing terms. Michael should have been here too. 

“Michael will be back,” Gabriel said eventually. “HIs illusions decided to start the apocalypse. A garrison of angels will release Dean from Hell when the first seal breaks.”

“They think he’s Michael’s vessel.” Sam tried to chortle, but it came out as a half sob instead. “And me?” Gabriel couldn’t think of a response Sam couldn’t already guess at. Sam continued as though that was expected. “The boy with the demon blood and the Archangel that was almost the scourge of mankind.” Sam sighed. “I remember being angry. It was like a cloud so thick I couldn’t be anything else. Except maybe jealousy.” He sighed again. “It’s gone now, though. It’ll stay gone, right?”

Gabriel winced. “Let’s sit.” He guided Sam over to the steps leading out the door. They sat down on the same step, halfway up the staircase. Gabriel’s feet rested comfortably on the bottom step, while Sam put his a few steps up. When they were both comfortable, Gabriel spoke. “I don’t know if Michael figured it out, but I think I know what happened all those years ago.” Sam waited patiently for Gabriel to explain, so he did. The youngest archangel pointed at the amulet Sam still held in his grasp. “Remember when dear old Dad gave you the key to Auntie Amara’s prison? Was that when you first remember feeling that way?” Sam nodded. “I know you gave the Mark to Cain, but I bet it left its own mark on your grace, so when Michael took his grace and yours and put it in the amulet, the cloud of negative emotion cleared.”

“Leaving our grace in the amulet is hardly a permanent solution if Michael’s illusions are going for the apocalypse. This path isn’t the right one. Is there a way to keep it from coming back?” Sam asked.

Gabriel nodded. “When Michael comes back from his vacation in Hell, we can ask him. He or Raph would know more about it than I do. If it’s separate from the grace, then maybe it could be left on the amulet.”

“Really?” Sam was hopeful for the first time since he’d gotten his memories back. He didn’t want to be the monster that his Father was ready to put in timeout forever. He wanted Dean back.  _ His twin was willing to go to Hell for him, _ but that didn’t mean he  _ should. _

“I think it’s far too early to give up hope.” Gabriel brushed a wing across Sam’s back as a comforting gesture. “It’ll be okay.”

* * *

Gabriel had always known about the third son of John Winchester. As his mission was to protect the reincarnations of Michael and Lucifer, he had to some extent slipped through the cracks. He had a mother that loved him a lot and the kid was really smart, so while Gabriel did check on him occasionally, there was never any reason to get involved. But following Dean’s death, it was almost as though Sam was standing on the edge of a precipice and it wouldn’t take a lot for him to jump. Gabriel supported Sam, but he wasn’t sure what else to do. Lucifer  _ knew  _ Michael was coming back, but the Sam at the bottom of the bottle wasn’t capable of making that rationalization, only acutely aware of the absence. With each day becoming increasingly difficult for Sam, Gabriel was running out of ideas of how to draw Sam out. Maybe learning about another brother would help, but first he had to make sure that Adam wouldn’t hurt Sam any more than he already was.

It wasn’t as though anyone had thought to inform Adam Milligan or his mother that John Winchester was dead. Adam might not have liked John very much, but it seemed like something he should know. Adam was home for Christmas break, so he flew to the neighborhood when he knew Kate would be at work and Adam was awake.

Gabriel landed on the sidewalk in front of the house, invisible to the rest of the neighborhood. It was a small town. The houses on this street were not very far apart and some of them were two stories tall. Adam’s house was one of the buildings two stories tall. It was a blue house with an attached garage. 

There was no one around, so Gabriel turned visible and walked up the driveway to the front porch. His enhanced senses told him that Adam as alive and well. He knocked.

It took a few minutes before Adam answered the door wearing jeans and a plain blue sweatshirt. “Who are you?”

“I’m a friend of the Winchester Family and I regret to inform you that John Winchester died two years ago. It seemed only fair that as his son, you should know that.”

Adam raised an eyebrow. “He was a douche who visited every once in a while. Why did it matter enough for you to come all the way out here to tell me yourself?”

"Because I have a vested interest in keeping your older brothers alive and don't want to see them hurt because you couldn't protect yourself long enough for them to protect you properly once they learn you exist."

Adam's eyebrow raised higher. “Older brothers? That's bullshit. I'm an only child.”

Gabriel shook his head. “John Winchester was the father of a Dean and Sam Winchester. But don't feel bad. John didn't tell them you exist and I haven't yet either.”

“You wanted to see if I had any interest in meeting them.” Adam leaned against the doorway studying Gabriel. His facial expression gave nothing away. Gabriel inclined his head and Adam made a show of considering. “I don't know. I mean, as I said, John was a douche. What if I don't want anything to do with him or his family?”

“That's your decision,” Gabriel answered. “I guess you don't owe them anything. But I also think that you shouldn't judge them just for being his kin. Ultimately, you'll have to decide what's best for you.” Gabriel turned to leave. Why had he thought this would work? He knew Adam had hated John. Why did he think this would work?

“Gabriel, wait.”

Gabriel turned around. He hadn’t given Adam his name, so how did the kid know? Looking closer than he had before, he saw it. Adam didn’t have a soul and strictly speaking wasn’t being used as a vessel either. Adam was Raphael, hiding very carefully, not unlike Gabriel as the Trickster. “Raph…”

“Your timing isn’t a coincidence, I’m certain. Come sit down and tell me what’s going on.”

Gabriel followed Raphael back inside and into the living room. He couldn't deal with Sam without help, not any longer, and he couldn't resist the lure of getting Raph’s help. It had been heartbreaking when his brother hadn’t believed him about the illusions and he wanted those bridges mended.

Raph sat in a chair so Gabriel sat on the couch across from him. Where was he supposed to start? “You left Heaven?”

“It was Michael’s illusion.”

“I told you he wasn't home! But nooooooo, 'we need to listen to him Gabriel, we need to obey our older brother,' well guess what! I was right! The whole time!" 

Raphael, with a deep sigh at Gabe’s antics, but still managing to smile anyway replied, "Yes Gabriel, you were right. I should have listened when you said Michael and Lucifer were illusions. When the illusion of Michael wanted the apocalypse, I guess I was okay with it because I hoped you would return with our real siblings. As far as I know, Dad’s dead, and as long as Lucifer doesn’t want any more deaths, I want our family back.”

Gabriel wanted to savor the “I told you so” but there were more important things than his ego. “Dean Winchester sold his soul to bring his brother back from the dead. The host believes him to be Michael’s vessel, so when he breaks the first seal, they will harrow Hell. In the meantime, Sam’s not handling it well at all. John Winchester never told them about Adam. I was hoping that I could use it to distract him. I often feel that I was am only delaying the inevitable self destruction and I don’t know what to do.”

“Samuel Winchester is Lucifer?!” Raphael looked scandalized, then started laughing. “Of course he is.”

“So you did know about them?”

“I left because I got attached. Sam had such strong faith. He was selfless.”

“He’s self-sacrificing and he doesn’t believe that he has worth. Every day, he’s either getting angry at the drop of a hat, picking a fight with me at the slightest mention of Michael, or refusing to get out of bed because he can’t handle what’s happened. There’s no way to know what’s going to happen, how he’s going to respond to anything from day to day, and to be honest, I feel like I’m the only thing between him and a cliff he’s desperate to jump off.”

“I’ll try to help. If you really think finding out about Adam will help, I can do that. Just don’t expect a miracle of me, if things are truly as bad as you say.”

Gabriel nodded. After a moment, Raphael continued, “There’s some orphan ghouls that have been trying to get the jump on Adam and Kate Milligan. Think he’d enjoy helping with that hunt? John Winchester didn’t teach Adam Milligan about the monsters, but they don’t have to know that.”

“There’s only one way to find out,” Gabriel replied. “I’ll let you know.” He took flight, his destination being Sam. Wasn’t today Dean’s birthday?

  
  


When he landed, Sam was sitting on the floor in front of the couch, smiling widely, a half empty bottle of scotch next to him, amid a myriad of other bottles. It took awhile for Gabriel to figure out how to react. “Hey Sam, what are you doing down there?” he asked, perching on the couch and looking down at his older brother as his head slowly fell to lean against Gabriel’s leg.

Sam laughed bitterly, reaching clumsily for the bottle to take another drink from it. “-fell offa the couch.” His voice slurred, and Gabriel nodded softly.

“And why would you do something like that? The floor doesn't seem anywhere near as comfy as the couch, or a bed, or basically anything else.” Gabe hated that Sam was so hurt by the death of Dean that he felt the need to drink so much, and he really did hope that his plan regarding introducing Sam to Adam would help, but he couldn’t do that if Sam was drunk off his ass. There was just no sense in trying to reason with a drunk Winchester, regardless of which one it was.

Sam mumbled something that was indecipherable, a hand slowly reaching around to grab at Gabriel’s pant leg as he leaned more of his weight on him. “‘It’s Dean’s birthday, an’ I didn’ wanna be upset, but then I just started drinkin’ an’ now I can’t be upset, but I don’ wanna be like this, but I don’ know what to do an’ I don’ wanna be sad but I’m always sad if I don’ drink, but if I don’ drink than I just feel worse and then I start wantin; to jus’ end it, but then everyone else will be sad, and I don’ wanna make everyone sad, but I do anyway when I drink, and…” Sam carried on for a while, unaware that he was repeating himself in his drunken state.

Gabriel’s heart broke for his brother, knowing that this was a combination of Sam’s own sorrow at the loss of Dean, and Lucifer’s deep seated regret for the actions that had led to both him and Michael running from their home to escape the wrath of a Father that claimed to have endless mercy and love for all, yet still threatened death to the one he had once said he loved the most.

It would have been hard enough to deal with everything had it only been Sam’s sorrow, but the recent acquisition of all of Lucifer’s memories had only made the problem worse. And from the look of things, Sam had seen no other option to cope with his pain than to drown it in a bottle before it grew so great that he would see fit to join his brother in Hell.

With a heavy sigh, Gabriel carefully stood, bending down to pick Sam up, paying no mind to the size difference. There was no way that Sam would be able to stand on his own, let alone walk all the way from the couch to the bed, where Gabriel wanted him. “Come on kiddo, that’s more than enough drinking for today. It’s time for you to sleep some of this off before you say or do anything else that you’ll regret later.”

Sam was still mumbling as Gabriel laid him on the bed, only pausing to yawn, before reaching out and grabbing at Gabriel’s shirt and pulling at it. “Oh Sam, you’re breaking my heart here. Alright, move over. I’m not leaving, I promise. Not after what you just admitted.” Shifting Sam over so he could sit next to him, Gabriel smiled sadly as the tall man tried his hardest to get as close to him as possible, slowly falling into a light doze.

There was so much that needed to be done, not only to attempt to prepare for when Dean would return from Hell, but also to even attempt to begin to help Sam recover from the vast amount of pain that he had suffered over his lifetime, as well as from his recently remembered past as Lucifer, that Gabriel didn’t even know where to begin. All he could do was hope that trying to bring Adam into Sam’s life would make things a touch better, but even that was a long stretch. He had tried his hardest, but he couldn’t try to keep Sam afloat any longer by himself. Sam needed Dean, even more than Lucifer had needed Michael all those years ago in Heaven, but there was no way for Gabriel to free Dean without incurring vastly more problems for everyone involved.

 

But as Sam shifted, burying his head in Gabriel’s side, Gabriel shook his head, running a hand through his hair. There would be plenty enough time to struggle to find a way to keep Sam afloat tomorrow. For tonight, he would watch over Sam, and in the morning, he would take him to meet Adam. And after that?

Well, only the future would tell.

* * *

 

“You’re probably not going to like this, but you should know about it.” Gabriel wasn’t sure how to phrase it. How did you tell someone they had a half sibling they’d never known about? He had waited for Sam to wake up, and the hunter had even left his room without being asked, dragged, or threatened.

There was a movie playing in the background, but Sam didn’t know what movie it was. He was lying on the couch staring at his eyelids. He did that a lot, but he never saw what he was looking for. No surprises there. Sam opened his eyes and looked over at Gabriel. “Yeah?”

Gabriel walked over to the couch and sat down on the arm by Sam’s head. Sam’s legs were taking up all the rest of the couch. “When you and Dean were kids, John got involved with a woman when he was on a hunt and had another kid.”

Sam frowned. “Really?”

“He’s a good kid, name’s Adam. He graduated early, top of his class, and now he’s attending medical school. No one told him and his mother that John Winchester died. You guys don’t exactly have a list of people to notify in case of emergency. I gave him my condolences and mentioned he’s not the only child of John Winchester. He’s willing to meet you and I think you should.”   
  


Sam agreed, so Gabriel flew him directly to the front porch of the Milligan household. “He’s expecting us,” Gabriel whispered when Sam tensed.

The front door flew open. “You must be Sam!” the teenager exclaimed. “I’m Adam!”

Sam gave the kid a weak smile and held out a hand. “Yes, I am Sam. It’s nice to meet you, Adam.”

Adam shook the proffered hand. “Did Gabriel mention I have a ghoul problem?”

“He did,” Sam replied. “I was curious about how you knew it was a ghoul.”

“Dad met Mom when she stitched him up after he’d hunted a ghoul, so I’ve done research on them. It seems highly coincidental that there would be more, but Dad only killed one and for how obvious they were being, I’d guess there were more. In some of my research, I found something about how they'll seek revenge if a family member is killed, which could explain why they’re here. I think they’ve been following me and Mom. She didn’t come home from work last night.”

Sam nodded. “May we come inside?”

“Of course.” Adam led the way towards the living room.

Sam hung back, whispering to Gabriel. “You’re sure he’s not a ghoul?”

Adam pretended not to hear and Gabriel answered, “Of course he isn’t. I already checked.”

“And the ghoul story?”

“For what it’s worth, I think there’s two. But I’m not doing your hunting for you. I think it’ll be a good bonding experience between you and your brother.” Gabriel sped up, forcing Sam to move faster.

Adam sat in the chair again and Gabriel crowded Sam on the couch. “I’ve done some research for the area. There’s been reports of frequent grave robbing.”

“That would fit with the idea that it’s ghouls,” Sam agreed. “They’re scavengers, but they can shapeshift to look like anything they’ve eaten, whether it’s bodies of the deceased or people they’ve attacked even if they don’t kill.”

“If they’re scavengers, why would they come after me and Mom?” Adam asked.

“Most likely for the reason you suspected: Revenge. They could also intend to use you to get to John. He’s dead, but they don’t know that.”

“How do you think we should hunt them?” Adam asked.

Sam looked at Adam and what he saw was a kid who wanted to make everyone happy. Curses on John Winchester for introducing him to this life. Curses on him for ever having children. He wanted to tell his brother that he would handle it, but that would be unfair for other reasons. The kid wanted to help. So he’d have to let him and keep him safe. “They have to be killed by decapitation.” He smiled sadly. “Dean, my older brother, his favorite way was bashing in their brains. But decapitation is better, more thorough. But first we have to find them.”

Adam nodded and looked thoughtful. “If they’re after me, you could use me as bait!”

“No!” Sam howled, almost beyond thought. Gabriel gripped his knee sharply to keep him from bolting. “No,” Sam repeated gentler. “I’m sure you’re capable, but we never use someone as bait. We need weapons first. Machetes are good for ghouls.”

The teen considered, then nodded. “There’s one upstairs you can use. I’ve got a good long knife that I’ve had lots of practice with, can I use that?”

“That’s a good idea,” Sam agreed. A machete would have been better, but a weapon he already knew how to use would be safer. And hopefully Sam could kill it without Adam needing to get involved.

“Okay! I’ll go get them.” Adam jumped up and purposefully walked towards the next room.

The hairs on the back of Sam’s neck bristled. “Go with him,” Sam whispered. Something was wrong here. “If anything happens to him, I will stab you.”

Gabriel raised an eyebrow at Sam. He couldn’t feel any changes but chose not to question Sam. He got up. Raphael turned to look at him, but he didn’t say anything, just shrugged and continued towards the stairs. “What happened?” Raphael asked when they were out of earshot of Sam.

“I’m not sure,” Gabriel replied. “He’s good at identifying things out of place, but I don’t feel anything, so I don’t know. It could be an overprotective big brother thing.” He shrugged. “A long knife? Raph, you wouldn’t happen to be talking about your blade would you?”

“Swords are good for decapitation. But I’d rather not have to explain that to Sam. Then again, fencing is a thing.”

“You can hardly decapitate a person with a foil.”

When Adam and Gabriel were out of sight, Sam stood. Gabriel had been certain nothing was out of the usual for this house. So why did it feel like he was being watched?

Sam closed his eyes. The wall Azazel had put up had been pretty sturdy. But he was an archangel and some preternatural senses would be pretty useful right about now. This was about keeping family safe, and when it comes to family, anything goes.

The smell hit Sam like a bag of bricks. It was death and decay, rotting corpses and the things that feast on them.

He let the barrier fall back into place and resisted the urge to run. He was being watched the only thing that runs is prey. Adam and Gabriel were elsewhere, so they were safe, because it was watching him.

Sam cast his gaze around the room. It wasn't an invisible creature and if it was in the house properly, then Gabriel would have noticed. As he looked, he found a grate in the wall. He didn’t have a weapon, not a physical one, but he couldn’t let it find another way out or give it time to kill Adam. He would not lose another one. Not today.

_ Focus, Sam.  _ Pushing the grate telepathically was easy. He remembered what it felt like when he’d shoved the wardrobe. Archangels didn’t need their grace to retain their photographic memories, he just had to know what he was looking for. Finding the ghoul was even easier. Sam would have been a psychic in any life, but demon blood did weird things to natural abilities, and acted weirder still when angelic predispositions existed.

The ghoul jumped through the hole in the wall where the grate had been. It must have recognized the danger it was in. Sam had been born a dangerous predator. Everything that happened since then didn’t make that any less true.

Sam gave a mental push. He couldn't let the ghoul touch him. Gabriel would recognize any imposter, but Adam wouldn’t. The pictures on the wall shook, but the ghoul kept coming. There was a rush in Sam’s ears and he was certain that was blood dripping from his nose. He lost his balance when the floor vibrated in unison with what almost sounded like voices too loud and far away from him to make out any words.

The ghoul was right there and unaffected, so Sam reached out with his hands- those were his hands, right?- and shoved. It wasn’t so much a physical blow as a mental zap that vaporized the creature.

Sam was already half on the floor and he decided that it would be just as comfortable as a bed.

  
  


Gabriel and Raphael were upstairs when they heard the crash from the metal grate. They materialized their blades and hurried back downstairs in time to feel the house shaking, and then to see Sam smite the ghoul. “I thought you said he could handle a hunt,” Raphael said.

‘If I had thought this could happen, I would have recommended a coffee shop. Why was the ghoul that probably ate your mother in the wall?”

“I had no idea it was there.”

They stepped into the living room. Sam was lying on the floor, unmoving except for the rise and fall of his chest and the blood dripping from his nose. Gabriel looked to run forward, but Raphael stopped him. “Let me.”

Raphael approached Sam slowly. The hunter was human, but he was also Lucifer and Lucifer had never been someone you’d want to startle when he was sleeping and/or injured. This human had also been raised not to allow anyone to catch him unawares. 

The archangel of healing knelt by Sam’s head and touched his forehead. The bloody nose was easy to stop. He wouldn’t know about the possible lingering headache until Sam told him about it. If he told him about it.

“Tell me what really happened.” Raphael looked over his shoulder at Gabriel. “I expect him to give me a modified explanation, but I can’t really make sure he’s alright if I don’t know the details.”

“He was fed demon blood by Azazel as an infant. The powers affected by that had started acting up, but when Azazel was killed, they had seemed to be gone. Michael put his and Lucifer’s grace into the amulet he’s wearing. I think he may have found a way to use both powers to find and smite the ghoul. When he used the psychic powers before, they have resulted in his nose bleeding. The demon plan was for Sam to be the boy king of Hell, but no one seems to know Sam very well at all. He never would have gone for it.”

Raphael nodded. “He may have tried to act as a conduit for the grace in the amulet. He’s lucky he didn’t fry himself, but I think he’ll be fine. We’ll know more when he wakes up.”

The archangels sat on the sofa while they waited for Sam to wake up. He slept soundly and without being plagued by nightmares. “We should wake him,” Gabriel suggested after the sky had turned dark. “He really shouldn’t sleep on the floor.”

“Let him sleep,” his brother replied. “From what you said yesterday, he needs some sleep without worrying about anything.”

“But, Raph, what if something’s wrong?”

* * *

Sam drifted into awareness when there were voices in the background of the pain in his head. Gabriel’s voice he recognized with certainty; the second voice was fuzzier. He thought he heard Gabriel say, “Raphael,” but that didn’t make sense. Raph was still in heaven so they were estranged from him. Right? Except then he said it again, so Sam sat up, looking for his other other little brother. He only saw Gabriel and Adam. Who had Gabriel been talking to? Maybe if he could see…

“Whoa! Sam, don’t do that!” Adam moved towards him. “You almost fried your brain once today, you don’t need to do it again.”

Sam could feel the wall between him and the demon powers. If he could just push it, then maybe he could see Raphael.

Gabriel crouched next to Sam. “Sam, stop, you’re going to hurt yourself and I need to you to not, okay?”

Sam blinked. He could almost see the wall as a physical structure and if he could just… A cold hand clasped his arm, causing the wall to disappear.

“Luci,” Adam said. “Regardless of why you think frying your brain is an acceptable risk, it’s not. I did not spend the last two decades down here just so Micahel can find me in negligence because you fried yourself.”

“Raph?” Sam blinked past the pounding in his head as he tried to see what he knew was there.

“Yes, it’s me,” Adam, Raphael, whispered. He leaned forward so he could lie down next to Sam. “Does your head hurt?”

Sam shrugged, but Raphael recognized the body language. It was Lucifer’s, “Something might hurt but I don’t care to talk about it because I’d rather suffer in silence,” shrug. Gabriel laid down on Sam’s other side and Raphael put a finger on Sam’s forehead.

Sam didn’t try to resist Raphael. It was nice having Raphael on one side and Gabriel on the other. I was almost like old times in their nest, except for the most important thing. They were missing their brother. Sam still felt like half of him was missing. Not the grace that hung safely around his neck.

“Was that necessary?” Gabriel asked after Raphael had knocked Sam out.

“I couldn’t figure out why his head hurts if he kept going on about missing Michael. You would think they were supposed to be one person, the way they’re so codependent.”

“Do you think Father intended to make two? Mica and Luci always talked about it as though they’d been created in the same instant.”

“Only Father knows what Father wanted, and I guess that if he wanted us to know, then he would have told us himself.”

“I think he did, though. His last words to us were to love humanity more than we love him. The apocalypse would destroy them and I don’t think he’d want us to destroy his favorite creation. Especially not in hopes of getting him to come home. He would just be angry. As angry or angrier than when Luci told him they were destroying the planet.”

“They are! But I get your point.” The two awake archangels laid in silence listening to the third sleep. Michael would come back to them, just they needed to have patience.

* * *

Chuck studied the pages he’d just written. Adam, who wasn’t supposed to make an appearance until after he had died, had already shown up. Why had the Trickster come back? He wasn’t supposed to make another appearance until he tried to get the boys to say yes! He knew where the road with Lilith was supposed to go, Sam was supposed to get addicted to demon blood so he could both kill Lilith and house an archangel.  _ Except he already was. _

It wasn’t what was supposed to happen, but Chuck decided that if you liked stories with redemption, this wasn’t too bad. Except he knew that Dean, Sam, and Adam weren’t supposed to be actual archangels, they were just supposed to be vessels. He’d tried to fix it! Ruby was supposed to kill some demons for Sam while Gabriel was busy keeping Dean alive, but nothing had changed! Gabriel killed the Wrong Demon and saved the Wrong Winchester and everything had only gotten more off track from there! The boys weren't supposed to know that Gabriel was an archangel, and now Sam knew Adam was also an archangel. He and Dean had not been supposed to ever meet the real Adam.

He was sure he could fix this though. Chuck was not going to subject his readers to Sam Winchester trying to join his brother in Hell. Lucifer really should have known better, but Chuck had left that part out of the novels because it wouldn’t make any sense for there to be two copies of three of the four archangels running around. He could just say that their memories were in that damn amulet, along with their powers.

But first he had to stop Sam from the dark track he was spiraling down. It was hardly like his ill-thought out suicide attempt would be successful, but still, none of his children should have to suffer like that. Raphael and Gabriel would find him and fix it, probably, but there had to be a way to stop him from reaching that mindset in the first place, and since the introduction of Raphael had not fixed it, which it should have. So, what could he do? Sam would be fine as soon as Michael came back, but Dean had to be in hell for four months and at the time of Dean’s birthday, it hadn’t even been one.  _ So what could he- _ The thought came to him in a sudden moment of clarity, as if it’d been there all along and he simply hadn’t been looking at it from the right angle.  _ Stasis. _ If Sam and Lucifer were in stasis until Dean walked through that door, then he would be fine!

Turning back to his computer with a satisfied smile, he began to write once more. And as he wrote, so it happened.

* * *

The two archangels stayed lying on either side of their brother as he continued sleeping. Sam deserved a long peaceful sleep and they weren’t going to move for fear of waking him. Except Sam showed no sign of stirring, even after the first fourteen hours had passed.

A few days later, Gabriel sat up, his boredom finally overcoming his concern, and looked at Sam, then at Raphael. The Healer had allowed himself to slip into what passed for sleeping among angels. Having been passing for human, the other Archangel had mastered sleep in a way most of the Celestial had not. Gabriel was certain that it would take Michael and Lucifer even less time to embrace the habit, provided they chose to stay once they’d gotten their grace back. “Raph?” Gabriel whispered. He debated poking his brother or throwing something at him until his brother sleepily acknowledged that he’d heard him. “Raph, how long is Sam going to sleep?”

Raphael sat up on one arm and gave a slow blink. He looked over at his older brother in concern. “I only knocked him out long enough to fix the pain in his head. He should have awoken by now.”

“So then why’s he still sleeping?” Gabriel asked.

“I’m not sure.” Raphael reached over to touch Sam, but the hunter didn’t stir at all.

“What do you mean, you aren’t sure?” Gabriel cried. “Is there something wrong with him? Does he have a brain tumor, brain damage, a concussion?”

“No, brother,” Raphael said with a frustrated shake of his head, his hand not moving from Sam’s forehead, “All his vitals are healthy and strong, and he has no abnormalities to his physical form.” Raphael hesitated, “Unless you count his unusually large frame as an abnormality I guess.” 

“I count his abnormally large frame as perfect, you jerk,” the older archangel replied, “ But if he’s so fine, then why isn’t he waking up!” The last half of his sentence coming out as a yell.

Rahael fixed him with a pointed stare until Gabriel ducked his head in shame.

“I’m sorry for yelling at you Raph, I know you're doing what you can, it’s just, I can’t, it’s, it’s-”. His voice choked off as his eyes filled with tears, “We’ve been working so hard, and keepin him safe, and now-”.

“Hush brother,” Raphael soothed, reaching lightly over Sam’s sleeping form to embrace the older angel. “He is not in any danger, just asleep, and we will keep him safe while he sleeps.”

Gabriel snuffled and nodded into his brothers shoulder.

The archangels didn’t leave the room and over the course of the next few days, sporadically made half-hearted attempts to wake their sleeping brother. Nothing changed. 

And then Sam’s cell, his main one, rang. It had been left in a drawer in the room that was his. Gabriel and Raphael hadn’t even realized it still had a charge. With no need to keep up appearances, they were archangels after all, they had hardly moved from Sam’s side. They were both keeping the still form company. Nothing the two archangels had tried had been able to break whatever it was that kept their brother was awakening. They didn’t think it could be permanent, but they also couldn’t imagine anything strong enough to prevent two archangels from disturbing what they could only think of as an enchantment.

Gabriel sat up when the phone rang. He couldn’t remember the last time anyone had called Sam. He didn’t even receive the normal prank and scam calls that were common. Had it rung at all since Michael had gone to hell? Dean was the one who called Sam the most often.

Gabriel wasn’t the only one to move when the phone rang. Raphael blinked sleepily, trying to determine where the unfamiliar noise was coming from. They had been lying in silence for months, why was the phone making so much noise now?

Gabriel got up and answered the phone. “Hello?”  

After giving Michael the directions to the Milligan’s house, Gabriel hoped his brother could arrive with haste. Whatever was causing Sam to be in stasis, he and Raphael were unable to do anything about it. A quiet prayer to an absent father, all he’d wanted for aeons was for the four of them to be whole and well again. Michael, Lucifer, Raphael, and himself. That was all he had ever wanted, but even as close as that wish seemed, it still seemed so far away if even Michael could not awaken Sam.

* * *

Four months. That was how long it took for both Dean Winchester to break the first seal on the Cage and for an angel to successfully retrieve him from Hell a month after the seal broke.

Every day following the breaking of the seal, Raphael and Gabriel wondered if they should go harrow Hell themselves, and every day they realized they had to wait. Gabriel had been in hiding too long to harrow Hell himself and no one knew Raphael had left heaven, so his harrowing Hell would give too much away. So each day they apologized to the sleeping Sam and wished there was more they could do.

Michael woke up on the ground in a cemetery. It was sunny and quiet, and he remembered everything. The blood spilt in Hell was not something he could regret because there were more important things at stake. Like finding Gabriel, and Sam, and the little angel that had pulled him out of Hell.  _ “Don’t step on that fish, Castiel, God has big plans for that fish.” _ So the first thing on the agenda was a phone call.

Dean walked until he found an abandoned liquor store. There would be a phone inside, right? When the human who was also an archangel was poking around for a phone-  _ why didn’t he just pray? Gabriel was probably listening. Might even be watching because his baby brother was a dick. _ \- Instead of calling, he was interrupted by a loud voice bursting forth in Enochian, shrill as the crack of lighting and as powerful as rolling thunder that shook the windows.

“ **Take that you nerds! I brought him back from Hell!”** And then impossibly louder still, “ **Behold! Dean Winchester is saved!”**

**“Could you lower your voice? I’m trying to call my brother.”** Dean realized he sounded cranky, but couldn’t bring himself to care at that moment. He was being interrupted.

**“You can understand me? You can speak?!”**

**“Castiel! Lower your voice! I am a fragile human right now and I can’t hear anything else!”**

The shouting ceased and the building stopped shaking. “ **Thank you!”** Dean grumbled as he found a telephone. His irritation with the younger angel fading quickly into something warmer. Hopefully the phone would still work.

The phone answered on the third ring. 

**“Hey! So I’m not dead and I’m not sure why. Where are you?”**

The speaker who answered was Gabriel, and an address was rattled off. Dean hung up without even realizing he had yet to cease speaking in Enochian.

Michael hitch-hiked his way to the address Gabriel had given him. He'd expected it to be some seedy motel, but this was actually a decent house in a good neighborhood. Why would Sam have settled down? There were some alternatives that this was better than, but it still didn't make a lot of sense. Why choose some house in a random neighborhood, when the safer choice would rather clearly be to find somewhere secluded, where Sam wouldn’t be noticed if he tried to bring any weapons to or from the house?

“Sammy, what are you doing here?” He questioned as he walked up to the door, knocking softly as he did. He had no doubts that someone would be able to hear him, but he also didn’t want to be too loud and attract any unfriendly attention.

It wasn’t long before the door was opened, a frantic Gabriel pulling him inside quickly before slamming the door shut once more, throwing himself at Michael in a hug. “Michael, oh thank everything, you’re here, you’re back!” Gabriel cried, shaking with tears that likely hadn’t been shed in far too long.

Something was seriously wrong for Gabriel to be so upset. He hardly ever showed his frustrations or worries with anything other than mockery or tricks. “Gabe, what’s wrong? It isn’t like you to act this way. Where’s Sam anyway? I thought he would be down here by now.” Michael was honestly getting more and more worried about his brother.

Gabriel didn’t answer though, pulling Michael through the house and up the stairs, until they reached a closed door. Gabriel paused, before turning to face him again. “Before we go in, just, just know that this wasn’t our doing. We don’t know what happened, or how to fix it, or anything.”

Placing a hand on his brother’s shoulder, Michael smiled. “Regardless of what happens, I swear to you that you will not be blamed. Nor will Lucifer. Whatever’s happening, we’ll get through it together. I promise.”

Gabriel took a deep breath, and after a moment, pushed the door open.

Michael entered the room, looking around in confusion. He had been warned for some reason, but the room looked to be little more than a normal bedroom. The bedroom of a teenager with a vast array of interests true, but just a bedroom nonetheless.

And then he saw the bed.

  
  


And he knew exactly what Gabriel was talking about.

He ran to Lucifer’s side, shaking his shoulder desperately as he tried in vain to wake his brother. “Lucifer, please, you need to wake up, I didn’t go to hell and back just for you to sleep through me getting back!” But it wasn’t working. No matter what he tried, he wouldn’t wake up.

“What happened?”

The question was harsh, he knew it was. But in the face of his sorrow, it didn’t seem to matter. He wanted his brother, the one he had been closest to, the one he had given up  _ everything _ for, to wake up, to let him know he was okay, to do  _ anything _ .

“We don’t know. He fell asleep one day and just didn’t wake up.” Another entered the room then, likely the one the room belonged to, sitting on the other side of the bed. “We’ve tried everything, and nothing has worked.”

Michael scoffed then, turning tear filled eyes on the stranger. “There’s always something you haven’t tried. Who the hell are you anyway?”

The teen froze for a moment, before looking away. “I’m Adam, John Winchester’s son. Gabriel already told me.” He finally answered, but Michael couldn’t be bothered enough to care at the moment. As soon as he was sure that Lucifer would be alright he would try to make sense of the new development to the family, but right now he needed to focus. His brother needed him.

First he needed to know what was wrong with his brother. That he was asleep was more than obvious to see, but he needed to know the reason as to why before he could try to fix it. And even then, it was unlikely that he would be able to do anything, as his grace was still locked away, hidden in-

No, it couldn’t possibly be that simple. It had stayed with Sam the entire time that Michael was gone, it had stayed close enough that the separation shouldn’t have caused any problems for him. They’d been fine in all over their lifetimes, why now?

For the problem to be stemmed from the lack of grace within Lucifer was too easy. And yet Michael could think of no other potential solution that would cause no negative effects should he be wrong. Lucifer’s grace belonged with Lucifer, as Michael’s own belonged within him. The only danger would be the lock that their Father had placed upon Lucifer, but Michael had been in hell for forty years, giving him more than ample time to consider what must be done in order to extract the entireties of both of their respective grace from the amulet, while keeping the corrupting power of the lock trapped within.

An archangel at full power wouldn’t need sleep, of course, but if the return of their grace was not the solution, Michael would have other ways of diagnosing Lucifer.  _ Lucifer’s grace would talk to him in ways it wouldn’t talk to Gabriel or even Raphael, wherever the Healer was. But there were other more important things than his fourth brother when something was this wrong with Sam. _

“ **Ardpan** .” Michael spoke the single Enochian word loud enough for Gabriel and Adam to hear and wonder. The word didn’t have an exact English translation, but it was somewhere between casting something down and opening it.

The protective amulet around Sam’s neck had not left it since he’d taken the amulet from Dean’s cold dead body. Now, the metal of the amulet seemed to melt, allowing two blue balls to be released and float away from the gelatinous puddle that held no heat. The metal darkened as it revealed the lock that had once been a symbol of Lucifer’s favor but was in reality the reason for his supposed Fall.

One of the two balls of blue grace went up Sam’s nose while the other made a beeline for Michael. It stopped before it could be inhaled, as though giving Michael the illusion of choice. He could take his grace back, insuring full integration between not only his lives as Michael the archangel and Dean the hunter, but also between the other human lives he’d lived through the reincarnation cycle. Or he could continue on as Dean and Michael, free of the supposed personal responsibility of the apocalypse. Except he would never be free of it. Heaven’s legions believed Dean Winchester was the Righteous Man and that not only would he break the first seal, but that once all the seals were broken, he would say yes to Michael and let the Archangel wear him to prom. They might even resort to creative torture in an attempt to force his hand, because no one was more determined than a zealot who believed they were doing their God’s work. It would only lead to himself or one of his brothers getting hurt. It would be best, then, to just clean up the mess from the start. After Lucifer woke up.

Michael inhaled the blue ball of grace and there was no fanfare. He’d remembered everything before inhaling the grace, so it was easy to ensure that he didn’t accidentally let out too much power and either reveal his presence to the Host or blind Adam.  _ Why was Adam looking at him with so much emotion? Not fear, and probably not love, either, but something between warmth and awe. _

Lucifer tumbled out of bed with a crackle of grace and ice. There was no explosion of bright light or surge of electricity that brought with it the shattering of lightbulbs. He didn’t fall onto the floor because Michael was right there catching him and Sam blinked.  _ Michael _ had gone to Hell for him.  _ Michael  _ had suggested their falling so that it wouldn’t be  _ him _ stuck in the cage for aeons upon aeons until the end of the world. He moved, wrapping his arms around his brother in a crushing embrace because he was  _ here _ , where he should have been  _ all along  _ and he had so much to say because it wasn’t just himself and Michael here, but also Gabriel and Raphael and he had never been so happy for his family to be whole and complete.

Michael turned his head. Gabriel was standing in the doorway watching Michael and Lucifer without interrupting. He was trying not to impose himself, but Michael couldn’t have that so he held out his arms. “Come here,” he said. Gabriel didn’t move, unable to believe that after all this time, his brother was just going to accept his presence invading the moment Sam had been waiting months for. “Come here, Gabriel,” the eldest archangel repeated, insistent, but not in a tone that conveyed anger or disappointment.

Gabriel moved, not entirely of his own conscious decision. Michael’s arms wrapped around him in a very human embrace, but seconds later he felt the warmth and light pressure at his back that could only be attributed to wings. He’d been protecting his brothers since they had left heaven to become mortal, but in that moment, he could feel Michael’s grace humming happily where it belonged and he felt protected in a way he had not felt since he’d been a fledgling, chasing in the footsteps of Michael and Lucifer. Gabriel felt safe. Michael and Lucifer had their grace back, had not forgotten how to defend themselves, and he could safely let his guard down for a moment because his brothers weren’t going to let anything happen to him. Not now. Not ever again.  _ “Family don’t end with blood.” But they were blood and they were family and they loved him in return just as much as he loved them. _

  
  


Raphael had not left the room, and he couldn’t help but watch with hopeless longing.  _ Michael hadn’t even recognized him. It had made sense that he might not have without his grace, but even from where he was standing now he could feel the brightness in Lucifer’s, Michael’s and even Gabriel’s graces, and still Michael didn’t even notice he was here. He had to have felt his grace, and yet he said nothing.  _ He felt his own grace shy away at Gabriel’s silent press. They didn’t want him for the archangel that he was because he had failed to notice the deception in the beginning.  _ This was his penance. _

* * *

It couldn’t end there. The first seal had been broken, so both sides, angelic and demonic were working towards one final goal. The breaking of 66 seals so they could release what they believed to be Lucifer from the cage, so that he and the illusion they believed to be Michael could duke it out on Earth with a war to end all wars literally. Their reward would be paradise, and the return of their absent Father, or so they believed.

Sam and Dean, the real Michael and the real Lucifer, couldn’t let that happen. They couldn’t just go back to heaven, nor did they want to, and they still considered themselves protectors of humankind. They’d left before Father had, but they’d still heard Father’s last command, to protect and love humanity more than they loved him. They’d been raised as hunters, but if that wasn’t protecting mankind then there was no such thing and Gabriel had been doing it in his own roundabout way even as he had protected them all the aeons they’d been on Earth.

So the new mission was set. Let the seals break while minimizing the damage to humans and their angelic siblings while also taking care of the monsters that saw humans as prey. Their conversation regarding it went something like this. The appearance of the angel who had let Dean out of Hell was just the icing on the cake.

__  
  


“Well… I’m not sure I want to go back to Heaven. I like it here. But we can’t let the apocalypse go down either. So I guess we’ll have to deal with the illusions.”

“And how are you going to do that?” Lucifer asked. 

“We let your copy out of its box and get my copy, and reprogram them to run Heaven well, then carry on without telling anyone.” Dean grinned. “And then we go back to killing sons of bitches and raising a lot of Hell!”

__  
  


There was a crash, followed by the appearance of Castiel in a vessel. Wearing a trench coat. “Who are you?” the younger angel cried brandishing his angel blade in an attempt to look fierce, but mostly failing since his wings were trembling and cowering behind him like two lost puppies. “What are you?” He continued in the same bold voice. ‘I pulled Dean Winchester out of perdition, but you are not Dean Winchester!” His eyes burned brightly with righteous anger, and his hands didn’t tremble on his blade despite his fear. 

**“I am Dean Winchester! But I’m also Michael,”** he admitted, **“And you’d better not tell anyone!** ” he snarled in Enochian.

“But... Michael is... Everyone knows that he is... That you are... seeking revelation in solitude!” The younger angels eyes widened and his wings drooped in confusion, the trembling fading.

“Just, don’t tell anyone about this, okay? Look, some of your superiors are trying to start the apocalypse, but they have the rest of your rank believing they’re stopping it. Now, they don’t know what’s really going on, but I need sixty-four of the seals to break, and we don’t know what they are.”

Castiel looked even more confused at this proclamation, but he was made for following orders, even when they didn’t make sense. And this was Michael. The real Michael, evidently. And his orders were newer than all of the previous ones, so this was good, and he would follow them. Invisible to the human eye, but seen by all the angels in the room, his wings picked back up, strong and resolute. He smiled at Michael. 

* * *

Michael was Dean just as much as he was the archangel of justice. His human lives had been too numerous to count, but none of them mattered except for who he was now. He was Dean Winchester, elder brother of Sam and Adam. He hunted the supernatural and protected mankind without their knowledge, which was more or less God’s last command to his kind. Yet he was also Michael, Archangel of Justice. He was Lucifer’s twin, and the elder brother of Raphael and Gabriel. He was also technically the elder brother of all the other angels, but he was more the leader of the legion than he was their sibling. Michael had no interest in returning to heaven, but he regretted that they had to do something about the illusions before he could return home. Gabriel was here, and Lucifer was here, but his family felt incomplete. He loved Adam, but Adam was no substitute or replacement for Raphael.

While they waited to hear back about the seals, Michael and Lucifer went on hunts just like they always did. With a few additions of course, Gabriel, Adam, and even Castiel. Sam wanted Adam to come and while Michael would have preferred the kid to have a normal life, there wasn’t much alternative. If he was just going to pick up hunting because his mother was dead, then at least tagging along with them they could keep Adam alive. Dean didn't know Adam yet, but he looked out for his baby brothers. Even ones he hadn’t been previously aware of having.

There was a cannibalistic creature and a shapeshifter. Time passed. Sam was looking for a new hunt when Castiel flew in.

“Michael,” the  blue-eyed angel spoke, “You asked me to tell you about any seals. It is the intention of the demons to break one tonight. One of the seals is the death of two reapers at sunset on the solstice, after the speaking of a Latin phrase.”

Dean swallowed. They needed to break the seals, but did it have to occur at the expense of their siblings? There were 664 seals that could be chosen, was this the only one that called for the death of their angelic kin?

“Uriel will ask you to prevent this seal from breaking without explaining it,” Castiel added. “He’ll expect you to succeed at the possible expense of the town.”

Michael glanced at Sam, who was looking at him. He sighed. “We can’t let that seal break. They’re our kin.”

Sam agreed. “Let’s go,” he said.

Adam was in the room and quietly listened to every word. Their reasoning was sound, but he wasn’t sure that his presence would be required. As long as he continued to keep his other identity a secret from Michael, then he couldn’t do anything when their kin were other angels involved. It was probably pure luck that Castiel hadn’t figured it out yet. “Can I stay here?” he asked.

Michael thought about Adam’s request. It made sense. Adam was a good hunter, but they were dealing with something that was trying to kill angelic kin, so it would be safer if their mortal brother stayed behind. He might have objected if one of them had suggested it, but if he was volunteering, there was no reason to say no. “Okay.”

“Would it really take all three of us?” Gabriel asked. “Surely you two can rescue a few reapers without our help.”

Michael agreed, so Castiel flew him and Lucifer away. Gabriel grinned at Raphael when he knew they were alone. “What do you say we watch a movie and take a nap?”

Raphael smiled. “That sounds good to me. We should watch that new nature documentary, Earth.”

  
  


Meanwhile, Castiel directed Michael and Lucifer to a town where at least one Reaper was being held hostage. He showed them to a building. “I believe they’re in there.”

The building was covered in Enochian sigils invisible to the human eye. The sigils were designed to prevent any angel with a rank lower than seraph from entering. There were sigils that would prevent the entrance of seraphs and archangels, but Michael was curious to know who put the sigils on the wall, since only a high level demon would know Enochian.

“I can’t go in,” Castiel said, looking slightly ashamed that he couldn’t.

“We can,” Michael replied, patting the smaller angel on the shoulder. “Don’t worry about it.” He looked over at Sam. “What do you think?”

“Do we have any idea what’s in there?” Sam asked. When Michael shook his head, he sighed. “All we know is that there’s at least one reaper in there, probably. That’s it.”

Castiel seemed to be sulking. “Since I seem to be of minimal help here, I will go assure that Uriel’s plans have yet to change, and that yours will not be interfered with.” Castiel said, looking between Sam and Dean as he spoke. 

“You do that buddy,” Dean said, shooting him a smile, “I’m glad we have you to keep an eye on that part of the angelic side of things.”

Looking far more pleased with himself, Castiel gave Dean a smile back, and with a simple swoosh of his wings, was gone. 

“So let’s go in then,” Michael said, clapping his hands together. “If we find any reapers, we release them.”

Sam didn’t look convinced, but he reluctantly agreed, and entered the funeral home. The place was empty, except in the main hall where there was an elaborate reaper trap drawn on the floor. Two reapers laid unconscious within the confines of the trap.

“Let’s get them out of here,” Lucifer whispered to his brother.

“Find this place okay?” A demon snarked as he stepped out from a darkened hallway. 

Michael recognized him and grimaced slightly. He couldn’t help it. “Alastair,” he growled under his breath.

“I wasn’t expecting you to be so… physical.” The demon was holding a shotgun and moved to point it at them. “I wanted to see what you thought of the rock salt. But not today. So, did you find this place okay?”

“With a bit of help,” Lucifer snarled. He might have created Demons, but he loathed them more than he’d ever disliked humans. And if Michael knew this one, there was a story there. Not a good one.

“Sammy, Sammy, Sammy. There’s nothing you can do to me, don’t you know that by now?” The demon’s eyes rolled back, showing white like Lilith’s.

“Release the reapers,” Michael snapped.

Alastair tsked. “No can do. Opening the seals is sanctioned. You’ll have to release them yourselves and you’ll have to go through me.”

“With pleasure.” Dean flew, landing behind the demon and put a hand on the back of his head. “This’ll be quicker than you deserve, but I have better things to do than waste my time with you.” Dean smote Alastair, the unfortunate human busting into flames as the demon tried to smoke out and found himself unable to do so.

Sam blasted the reaper trap, clearing the floor as though it had never been painted. Tessa and the second reaper regained consciousness.

“What happened?” Tessa asked.

“Apocalypse stuff,” Michael answered. “You’re free to go.”

Tessa raised an eyebrow. “Michael.”

“Don’t you have a job to be doing?” Michael’s eyebrow mirrored hers. “And all this had better stay between just us.”

“Don’t’ worry about that.” Tessa was smirking as she and the second reaper flew away.

Sam rolled his eyes. “Reapers rescued, Alastair smote. Let’s get out of here before someone starts wondering what’s really going on.”

Dean nodded. He took flight, landing outside their hotel with Sam on his heels. It was early evening, so he entered their room quietly in case Adam was sleeping.

Gabriel and Adam were sound asleep on the large bed in the middle of the room. They were both wearing fuzzy pj’s and were surrounded by fleece blankets and pillows and there was at least one stuffed corgi, and three stuffed platypus. 

Sitting off to the side of the room in a chair, and still dressed in his ever present trench coat, sat Castiel. He looked distinctly uncomfortable, and more than a little uncertain with himself. 

“What are you doing over there, buddy?” Dean asked kindly. 

Castiel looked at Michael with a slight glaze of panic in his eyes. “I do not understand the purpose of this exercise, but I believe it is supposed to be some sort of bonding experience?” The dark haired angel confessed. “ However, I am uncertain on whether this is correct.”

“Yeah, you got that right, Castiel.” This time it was Sam who answered. 

They glanced over to where there was a movie playing on the television. Dean didn’t recognize it, but Sam must have. “Awesome! It’s the new Earth documentary!” Lucifer plopped down on the bed, sliding over next to Adam. Their youngest brother didn’t stir.

Dean shot Castiel a quick thumbs up, which seemed to relax the younger angel, before he cast an amused gaze back at what could only be described as a dog pile on the bed. 

Still, Michael couldn’t resist the urge to join his siblings on the bed. He hadn’t used much grace smiting Alastair, but that didn’t mean it couldn’t use the opportunity to recharge. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen Gabe and Luci looking so relaxed, nor Adam so innocent. He laid down by Gabriel’s side, letting out a sigh as his grace reached for his siblings.

He miscounted and his sleepy consciousness wondered momentarily why there seemed to be an extra grace in the room, but he passed it off as nothing. It could have been an echo from Castiel flying with others, or a reminder that Raphael wasn’t there. He missed his other younger brother, but his choice had been pretty clear from what Gabriel had said. If Raphael had wanted to be here, he would have been here.

* * *

The next four hunts were easy. There was a ghost and a feral child in the walls of a house, a magician using real magic to kill other magicians, a ghost haunting one of the high schools they had once attended, and a siren. None of the hunts were too far out of the range of normal, but the first two had definitely been unsettling. The two archangels could understand monsters, especially the monsters that had always been monsters, but there was something unsettling about humans at their worst.

“I just heard about a girl in a psychiatric ward,” Gabriel said. “She’s claiming to hear angels.”

“Isn’t that a common human delusion?” Adam asked.

“Well, sure.” Gabriel smirked, looking over at Sam and Dean. “Demons are trying to kidnap her because they’re sure her information is valid, and the angels want her dead. They’re accusing her of treason. For falling.”

“She tore out her grace,” Michael whispered. “Why would she do that?”

“I asked around, but no one wanted to tell me. Personally, it sounds like Heaven’s gone a little crazy. Something about anyone not toeing the company line facing some serious consequences.”

Michael sighed. Why couldn’t he just go reprogram his illusion now? It was clearly doing a piss-poor job of running heaven. But no, he had to get Lucifer’s illusion out of the Cage first before it could cause any trouble so for right now, their goals aligned. Hopefully not for much longer.

“You should do something about that.” Raphael’s utterance was under his breath. He never actively regretted leaving Heaven, but sometimes he worried about the state of things at times like this when it was extra obvious that everything had gone to pieces up there.  _ If only he’d been more proactive. If only he had been an actual leader while the illusion had been seeking revelation.  _ Could an illusion even benefit from seeking revelation? It was still an illusion.

“I think that at the very least, we should meet her before making any judgments,” Sam suggested.

“Then let’s go.” Raphael was skeptical, but he did want to meet the fallen angel. Maybe talk to her.

Gabriel gave Michael and Lucifer the location, letting them fly on ahead. “I'll fly with Adam.”

The Winchesters took off, giving Adam and Gabriel the room. Gabriel turned to Adam as the other raised an eyebrow at him. “Raph… I'm worried about you.”

Adam turned around and walked to the edge of the bed, sitting down on it. He folded his legs to his chin as a way to make himself look smaller. It wasn't as small as he felt right then.

Gabriel followed Raphael to the bed, not quite sure what his brother wanted. His brother was sitting off center from the middle so there was mostly of room for Gabriel to sit next to him.

“What do you want me to say?” Raphael asked. His voice was still quiet. Not quite a whisper. Gabriel didn't answer. “I miss heaven, but it wasn't the same with you all gone. I wish I'd listened to you, I wish I'd done a better job at leading heaven. I wish Michael knew who I was.” Raphael's position tightened as he squeezed his legs tighter to his chest. “I wish he would hug me because he knows who I really am, not for misguided feelings he has for a younger brother that shouldn't even exist.”

Gabriel wrapped his arms around Adam's form. “I love you and Lucifer loves you, and despite the fact that Michael is a moron, he loves you too. He should have been able to see through this, but you have hidden yourself even better than I did. You should tell him.”

Raphael shook his head. “I can't. He's going to be so angry.”

Gabriel could hear the hitch in Adam's voice. He and Lucifer had started to wonder how well their brother was holding himself together. He wasn’t hysterical yet, but it also didn’t sound like that was too far off. “Just bluster, Raph. He’ll mostly be sad that you thought this was necessary.” He waited to see if Raphael would interject, but his brother didn’t move to speak. “We should catch up to them, you ready to go?”

When Adam nodded, Gabriel flew, making sure to land right after Michael and Lucifer. Michael bought it easily and started heading inside. Adam followed Dean, but Sam hung back with Gabriel as they followed at a slower pace. The older archangel raised an eyebrow. “Everything all right?”

Gabriel knew what Lucifer was asking. Lucifer knew that there had been an ulterior motive behind Gabriel and Raphael getting at least a moment of time alone, and the other archangel was well aware that Gabriel had an affinity for playing with time. “I’m worried about him.”

Michael found Anna’s room first with the others not too far behind. Adam stopped by the doorframe.

Every inch of the walls were covered, a single compound sentence written over and over again in a foreign language no human should have been able read. It was written as “A dooain de iado, a goaal de tol, ils adarepeheta a oi aala balzodizodarasa”. There was a drawing pad on the bed in front of her, but it was closed.

Anna crouched on her small bed, rocking on her heels and scratching at her wrist. She repeated the writing on the wall repetitiously.

There was an unconscious body on the floor, which Michael stepped over as he entered the room. Lucifer followed, while Gabriel stood on the other side of the door frame from Adam. Michael assumed the unconscious body was there because the phrase Anna was repeating was an Enochian exorcism.

“Anna,” Dean said. He spoke softly, trying not to scare her any more than she already was. Apparently for good reason, if the body was anything to go by.

The girl whimpered, but her rocking slowed as she looked up at the voice she didn’t recognize. She continued speaking the exorcism, too afraid of what might happen if she stopped. 

“Anna,” Dean repeated. “We’re not going to hurt you. We’re just here to talk okay?”

She stopped chanting, but Anna stared at Dean, eyes wide. “Dean Winchester.” Her voice was hoarse from constant use yet held more clarity than the exorcism had conveyed. She pointed. “You’re Dean Winchester,” she repeated. Her finger moved from pointing at the elder brother to Sam. “You must be Sam.”

“How do you know that?” Sam’s voice was far from condescending, instead expressing mere curiosity.

“The angels. They’re always talking about you.”

“When did you first start to hear them?” Sam asked.

“May 2nd. I heard,  ‘Dean Winchester is saved,’ in my head with perfect clarity. The voices aren’t constant, but I hear enough.”

Dean nodded. That made sense. Somehow his being raised from perdition had let her hear the angel radio again. “Do you remember why you fell?”

“What?! No!”

Dean stared her down. She’d answered too quickly to not be lying. “Anna.”

Anna put an index finger in her mouth, gnawing on her nail as she thought about what they wanted to know. “I found out heaven was being run by a regent, heading towards the apocalypse. I wanted no part of it so I tore out my grace and left.”

Michael could understand why that would cause her to leave. But if any of the angels knew that reason, Anna was in danger from them. She was also in danger from demons, as the unconscious person on the floor suggested, because they would want to use her to access the angel radio.

“We should get out of here,” Sam suggested. “Is there a safer place you can go?”

Anna shrugged. “Not that I know of.”

“We'll find one, okay?” Michael asked.

“Okay.”

Anna followed as Sam and Dean headed for the door.

“We're going to meet our brothers in the car,” Dean added, prompting Adam and Gabriel into knowing where they would meet up.

Gabriel flew Adam to get the car and then put it in the parking lot. They sat in the backseat, with Adam in the middle.

Sam, Dean, and Anna came down. “Leg room law puts Sam in the front seat,” Dean warned.

“That's fine,” Anna replied. “Do I have to sit in the middle?”

“I think Adam was willing to sit there,” Sam answered.

They piled into the car. They hadn't made it more than a few blocks before Adam was sound asleep with his head on Gabriel's shoulder.

“So where are we going?” Anna asked.

“We could get you a nice pocket world until this blows over. Do you want your grace back? We can find it, if you want it. And it would be best if that it doesn’t get in the wrong hands even if you don’t want it. Which is your choice.”

“How are you going to find my grace?”

“Your grace was in a tree, which is where we’re headed. It might not still be there, but that’s where it was.” 

Anna hummed her confusion but didn't say anything. She glanced sideways to find that Adam was still deeply asleep. There was something out of place about that, but she couldn't identify what it was exactly.

  
  


Eventually, they arrived at the forest. Adam was still sleeping when they got there and at some point, Anna had also fallen into a light doze.

“We'll have to walk from here,” Dean said as he pulled into a parking space and shifted into park. He looked over the seat at the sleeping passengers. “Is anyone awake back there?”

Gabriel scowled back, unamused. “I'm quite sure they both heard every word. Anna?”

“I'm awake! I'm awake!” Anna glanced at the window, taking in the number of trees. “We’re here?”

“Yep! It’s after closing, but the trail leads straight to the tree we’re looking for.”

They all clamored out of the car, with Gabriel and Adam exiting last because up until that moment, Adam had still been asleep. The trail led to the heart of the forest, where the largest tree stood towering over everything.

“Is it still here?” Anna stepped closer and closer to the tree, sure that she should be listening for a humming sound and being unable to hear it.

“I believe so,” Sam answered, walking towards the tree. “Do you want it back? Or would you prefer to keep your human life?”

“I love being human,” Anna admitted. “Humans have feelings that weren’t aloud within the Choir. Someone tortures the feelings out of angels in a reeducation program.” She looked directly at Michael. “And yet, I foresee changes coming as a possible outcome of this apocalypse. You won’t think less of me if I take you up on your offer of waiting in a pocket universe?’

“Of course not,” Gabriel replied. “No more of our siblings should have to die.”

“So you are an angel. I’d wondered.” She turned, facing each in turn. “So are you.” She pointed at Dean and Sam both in relation to her statement, but as she was about to do the same to Adam, he shook his head minutely, stopping her. She  _ knew  _ what he was, but she didn’t think the secret he was keeping would hurt them. Or at least, she hoped not. But there was definitely something wrong with him. He didn’t appear quite as otherworldly as his brothers. Did he know that unattended self-depreciation could cause a Fall? Hers had not been quite so slow, for which she was grateful, but it had also been less agonizing than such a drawn out self-inflicted torture.

“You can’t tell anyone,” Michael instructed before retrieving her grace from the tree and creating a special receptacle only she could open. “Not until the apocalypse is over and everything is set to rights.”

“Who would I tell?” Anna grinned as Gabriel created a doorway to a pocket dimension that would design itself to fit Anna’s desires. “Thank you for this.”

The archangels watched as Anna stepped through the doorway and disappeared. 

“Let’s go find ourselves another hunt,” Michael decided with little argument from the others. “It’s almost Halloween. I’m sure we can scare ourselves up a little something.”

* * *

Adam had taken a walk around the block in an attempt to wake himself up since the caffeine hadn’t helped and Gabriel had gone with him. Michael didn’t entirely understand why Gabriel seemed to have taken Adam under his wing, but wasn’t going to worry about it as long as they didn’t hurt each other. Lucifer seemed to have done something similar, but Dean thought he understood that more easily.

That meant that when two angels flew into their hotel room, only Sam and Dean were there, which was really for the best. Castiel was aware of Gabriel and Adam, but it was for the best if the others didn’t know. Not until after the illusions were taken care of, and maybe not even then, depending on what happened after. Besides, Dean didn’t feel that the younger angel was really a threat, if anything, he might actually kinda trust him.

“Sam Winchester,” the second strange angel greeted with distaste. “The boy with the demon blood. I am Uriel.”

Sam raised an eyebrow while pulling the part of himself that was Lucifer deeper down than he usually did. “It’s a pleasure,” he said. He said it because he knew that if he had not been Lucifer and had only learned that angels existed after Dean had come back from the dead, he would have been incredibly excited and would have been unable to understand the disgust they had for him. But he was Lucifer, and he understood. They were playing a role. Whether or not it was the role God had in mind for them remained to be seen. 

“What’s up?” Dean asked casually.

“Samhain is being summoned. I was inclined to raze this entire town to stop it, but Castiel has encouraged me to be lenient. Your job is to prevent this seal from breaking.”

“Yeah?” Dean’s voice held a hint of challenge. The only authority Michael had ever obeyed had been God’s. Dean had been the same way. Being told what to do still didn’t sit well. Who did the little upstart think he was?

“We’ll do it.” Sam was sure that once Uriel had left, they could find a way to let the seal break and save the town, but they had to get the angels off their backs first. Adam and Gabriel could be back any moment.

“Good. Castiel, come.” Uriel and Castiel were gone with the sound of wingbeats, and a worried glance from Cas before he swept away.

Adam and Gabriel came back less than five minutes later. “Did we miss anything?” Adam asked with a yawn when he saw that Sam and Dean were sitting at the table, planning.

“There’s a seal here, some witches trying to summon Samhain,” Sam answered. “Uriel gave us the, ‘stop the seal from breaking or we raze the town,’ spiel.”

“Wasn’t Samhain one of the Gaelic holidays that was later turned into Halloween? Like Yule and Christmas.”

“One of the Celtic deities went by the same name,” Sam replied.

Gabriel frowned. “He’s not a pagan anymore. I’m not sure when he became a demon, but a long time ago he was exorcised. Part of the seal is that he can only be summoned every 600 years, and this is the one chance this seal has to open without waiting another 600 years.”

“Is he going to destroy the town?” Dean asked.

“He can be exorcised again. What’s summoning him?”

“Witches. I hate witches!”

“Then let's find out who they are. Dead body at the morgue? Sam, why don't you and I go?”

The two of them went to the morgue. Adam was a little young to be an agent, but he could pass as an intern.

Sam shuddered when they leave. “Razor blades in the candy? Boiling water while bobbing for apples? Those are some pretty weird deaths.”

“Do you think if we looked around the crime scenes we would find hex bags?”

“Let's check it out.” Sam started walking because it wasn't far and they'd probably fly. “Hey, Raph? Have you been feeling alright?”

“Yeah,” Raphael replied. “I feel fine, why?”

Sam didn't buy it, but he didn't want to start a fight about it either. “You've seemed really exhausted lately, I just wanted to make sure everything was okay.”

“Yeah, I'm fine,” Raphael repeated. “I like sleep,” he added. It wasn't necessarily the truth, but it would get his brothers off his back. Maybe.

“If you're sure.” Lucifer spread his metaphysical wings, ready to take flight. “If you need anything, we're here for you. Ready to head over to the first  crime scene?”

Adam nodded, and followed Lucifer’s flight. His own wing beats were unusually weak and if he hadn't been following in Lucifer's path, he might not have reached their destination. Why was he so weak? He was an archangel, a flight of that distance would have been simple even for a cupid. So why did he feel like he had just run a marathon?

Lucifer frowned as he watched Raphael land. His younger brother made a good show of appearing to land normally, but the sweat on his brow told another story. He said nothing because the stubbornness of his brothers was something they all shared, and Raphael wasn't ready for his concern. He would take care of his brothers even when they didn't make it easy for him.

They found the hex bag with relative ease. Raphael opened it and shook the contents out into his hand. “Celtic coin, charred metacarpal, and a flower extinct for 200 years.”

“The summoning of Samhain does require three blood sacrifices before tomorrow night at midnight. The third becomes his meat suit.”

“We're not trying to prevent the seal from breaking but we need to find the location. We don't want Samhain to start running around.” Raphael put the items back in the hex bag and destroyed it with a touch of grace. It had served its purpose, but the effort left him momentarily light headed.

“At least we know where he'll head. Samhain was known for summoning ghosts, zombies, and all manner of undead creatures which followed him like a version of the pied piper. And the best place to make them is the cemetery. Shall we head back?”

When Adam agreed, Lucifer put a hand on his shoulder and took flight, this time doing the flying for Raphael. It would keep Dean from getting suspicious. It also prevented a repeat of whatever had happened when his brother had flown earlier without nagging for answers. His brother made no objection.

“I'm going to take a nap,” Adam declared before Dean could ask if they'd learned anything. He more or less collapsed onto the couch, asleep in seconds.

Dean watched Adam, and as soon as the youngest had fallen asleep, he turned back to Sam with a raised eyebrow. “Learn anything?”

“Hex bags. But we knew that already, more or less. If we don't find the witch, we know Samhain will go to the cemetery to raise the dead.”

“I might have a lead on the witches. The spell to summon Samhain requires two witches to cast it and I've learned a thing or two about the places that were targeted so far.” Dean described the connection between both victims and gave some ideas for possible people involved. The third victim would probably be one of the witches turning on the other.

They researched locations the next day. In case the angels were watching closer than they thought they were, Sam and Dean went to find the witches while Adam and Gabriel waited at the graveyard to rendezvous.

“You've been really sleepy,” Gabriel noted a little while before midnight.

Raphael made a noncommittal noise. He didn't want to talk about it. As long as Michael didn't think it was anything other than the fact that Adam was just a kid and as long as he didn't become a burden to his siblings he didn't want to talk about it. Gabriel was standing right next to him, so instead he stepped closer and leaned on him. His grace wanted to reach out, but he didn't let it. They were waiting for Samhain so there was no time for distractions.

Gabriel picked his battles and they didn't have time for this one. Lucifer had mentioned that something had seemed out of the ordinary with Raphael's grace, and he could agree that he was acting a little odd. He didn't know what to do and Lucifer had not offered any ideas himself. If only they could have gone to Michael.

There was still time before midnight, so Gabriel eased his grace gently against Raphael's. It wouldn't keep him from being able to take down Samhain if it came to that, and it was good for both of them.

Raphael's grace seemed smaller than usual, and duller in color. Gabriel didn't know what that meant, but it couldn't be a good thing. “Raph, I wish you would talk to us.” He spoke in a quiet whisper, and from the way his brother didn't seem to react to it, Raphael couldn't hear it.

Samhain came a little after midnight, and Sam exorcised him with relative ease. If the angels were watching, they would think it was the demon powers. His brothers knew otherwise.

“You guys alright?” Gabriel asked Sam and Dean.

“I think so,” Dean answered. “Do we want to head out in the morning?”

Adam yawned. “We could head out tonight. I can sleep in the car. Where are we going next?”

“I think we need a few days of R&R,” Gabriel argued. “We haven't seen any new cases we have to start tomorrow, have we?”

Michael and Lucifer agreed they could wait another day while they looked for cases, out voting Adam on leaving right away.

Since Michael, Lucifer, and Gabriel didn't technically need sleep, Adam slept on one of the beds while Lucifer stayed up looking for cases. Dean wanted to hit a bar, so as soon as he left, Gabriel laid down by Adam. Raphael should not have needed sleep any more than the rest of them, even if he was only playing on Dean's expectation of what he thought his human brother should need.

The sleeping archangel did not awaken even as Gabriel laid next to him and touched his grace to his brother’s. He did roll over, as though trying to get closer.

Sam smiled at his sleeping brothers. Michael was missing out and he had no idea. It was a shame.

After writing a note detailing what he anticipated to be the next hunt, Sam stepped outside. It was early in the morning and except for some of the highway traffic, it was quiet. The town was small, so there also wasn't a lot of light pollution. He liked this.

“Sam Winchester.” Castiel made his appearance by standing in front of the archangel, looking a little intimidated. “Uriel wished to condemn you, but I convinced him to let me come in his stead. Michael seemed otherwise occupied or I would have told him first, but this was the sixty-fifth seal to break. Lilith is fair game, though the Host believes she must be killed at your hands.”

“Do you know how to find her?” Sam asked, more hopeful about what they were doing than he'd been since he and Michael had gotten their graces back.

“The Cage could be opened from almost anywhere on Earth. But I believe she intends to be at a certain church where Azazel’s plan was first concocted. Many years ago, a church full of nuns were killed. That place is the most likely location.”

Castiel left with a small wave, as if uncertain how exactly he should interact with Lucifer before disappearing and leaving Sam to his own devices. The archangel slipped inside and joined his brothers without waking them. Lilith could wait until morning.

  
  


The next evening, Samuel and Dean Winchester went to the church Castiel had specified. Gabriel and Adam both had their own reasons for wanting to go, but Michael put his foot down. They were opening the cage and making sure the illusion of Lucifer wouldn't destroy Earth and possibly summoning the illusion of Michael, though that remained to be seen. The two eldest archangels could handle it, and Michael didn't want the possibility of putting their  human brother in this kind of danger and Gabriel had made it clear he wasn't ready to reveal himself to the Host so Michael wasn't going to let this be an opportunity for it to slip. They would get in and out quickly. Lucifer had created Lilith, after all.

Lilith was waiting in the antechamber of the church. She tried to close and seal the door behind Sam, but not before Dean could also enter. They were on the same side, here. Just as they had always been. The parallel between their reincarnation and their lives as Michael and Lucifer had not changed. Michael Fell to keep Lucifer out of the Cage and Dean went to Hell to bring Sam back from the dead. That the true Michael and the true Lucifer had come back to kill Lilith and remove their Apocalypse causing illusions was their way of taking personal responsibility, something they'd learned from humanity.

Lucifer smote Lilith. His icy grace burned her and she was gone. The last lock on the cage built to contain him was the death of the thing he'd created at the height of his insanity caused by the key to another cage and it was broken.

Dean pulled Sam back as the floor of the church  _ shattered _ downwards and bright light filled the room. Mortals might have been blinded and burned by the white light, and even the two archangels had to block some of it, but they both felt as  _ it  _ emerged.

The illusion of Lucifer was hellbent on the destruction mankind, his brother Michael, and any of his brethren that tried to stand in his way. Michael hadn't provided him with grace, just something that would pass as grace should it come under scrutiny by anyone who couldn't know any different. The fake grace was brown and oozed like oily slime.

“There's no way we can reprogram this illusion,” Michael said. “The Cage did too much damage.”

“So destroy it,” Sam replied. “Get rid of your own illusion too. That'll stop the biggest part of the apocalypse.”

Michael focused his grace on dispelling the illusion. It was his own creation and had never been fully autonomous. “The angels might think destroying mankind is the next step in whatever plan they think they're following.”

“So you'll stop them. They'll listen to you and Raphael. He'll back you for sure.”

“Raphael?” Michael blinked, narrowly avoiding a loss of focus. “What's he got to do with anything? Gabriel said he did nothing when everything went to shit.”

Lucifer smirked. His brother couldn't see it because of the bright light that hadn't faded. “I think he made as much of a shitty situation as we did and that you should stop making judgments without having all the facts. Shouldn't you be setting a better example as the archangel of justice?”

Michael hummed, neither agreeing or disagreeing. “Shit! If we go back to heaven, what about Adam?”

If possible, Sam's smirk grew wider.” I think you’ll be in for a few surprises,” he whispered under his breath. Michael couldn’t hear him, of course, but it wouldn’t do to give away Adam’s secret himself. “I’m quite positive that we’ll think of something if it comes to that,” he said louder.

The light faded as Michael finished destroying the fake Lucifer and everything it stood for. Dispelling his own illusion was even easier because all it took was breaking off the connection to the grace he’d been powering it with all these long years. His illusion had spent most of its time in seclusion, presumably seeking revelation, so if he decided to claim a more active role in the runnings of heaven, only those who had been seeking the apocalypse would be confused about the sudden change in plans. If Raphael actually backed the new play, they would be easy enough to persuade.

“Let’s get back to Adam and Gabriel and let them know that everything worked out,” Sam suggested.

“And maybe kill a few more sons of bitches while the world isn’t falling apart?” 

“Don’t you think we’ve earned at least a few days of downtime?” Lucifer rolled his eyes. “Okay, I already found the next hunt.”

  
  


The next hunt was a wishing well, and the hunt after it was a djinn. They killed that before it could poison Adam, which for some reason or another seemed to be its goal. No one knew why. Gabriel and Adam both suggested a vacation after that, but Michael found one last hunt he really thought was necessary. It was more than any of them bargained for.

Gabriel had just flown off for a few days because he wanted to make sure the angels weren’t about to wipe mankind off the face of the Earth with the sudden disappearance of who they’d thought was the devil and Adam was stuck trying to decide if it was finally a good time to tell Michael the truth, except he was worried that Michael would kick him out for lying by omission for most of a year. He thought he might even regret not telling him from the beginning, but there was absolutely nothing he could do about it now except worry himself sick. Which didn’t really help explain why his grace was acting even funnier than it had been.

“What about this?” Sam asked. “A perfectly healthy 44 year old man died from a heart attack in Rock Ridge the other day, and earlier this morning two more men about the same age died of heart attacks in Maumee, which is the next town over.”

“That’s unusual,” Adam said. He  _ had _ been a medical student in this life and that was fairly common knowledge. “Did the autopsies reveal anything?”

“We should go to Rock Ridge. That first death could be patient zero,” Dean suggested.

It was quickly decided that they should go. Sam and Dean would be agents Tyler and Perry, with Adam playing the diligent intern.

That was how they ended up in a room with a medical examiner who hasn't even done the autopsy yet.

“Agents Perry and Tyler. And our intern, Hamilton Kramer. We're here about the heart attack from a few days ago.”

“Why's the FBI interested in some guy who had a heart attack?”

“According to this file, he was 44, and a marathon runner. Why’d he die of a heart attack? There were two more up in Maumee this morning, similar in age. Can you just open him up and tell us what you see?”

The ME began the autopsy with a neat incision. Adam quickly offered the rib openers when they were necessary. The Winchesters would never get used to this part of the job, but Adam had finished his human medical schooling and he'd never stopped being an archangel whose original purpose had been that of a weapon, and of a healer. He was unbothered by the deceased human on the table. He could tell with barely a glance that the heart attack had been caused by a fear response strong enough to stop his heart despite being free of any obstructions. But he couldn't just say that because Dean wouldn't buy it.

“All the arteries are clear,” the ME said, sounding baffled and he pulled the heart out of the chest cavity.

When he looked to hand it to Dean, Raphael offered to hold it. That was a suitable duty for a supposed intern and both Michael and Lucifer already looked more than uncomfortable. He didn't mind. “Can you check his adrenaline levels?”

The ME raised an eyebrow at Adam, but before he could argue, Sam concurred with the request, so the ME complied. He took the readings and then stared at them. “How did you know? These readings are off the chart!”

Adam shared a look with Sam as Dean responded with a, “Thank you for your time.”

When they were outside after talking to the sheriff, Michael gave his youngest brother a good look.“Something you’d like to share with the class, Adam?”

Adam shrugged. “Adrenaline was the best identification I could think of. The presence of adrenaline in such a high amount would suggest that he was so terrified it stopped his heart and was the first thing I thought of that would stop the heart if the arteries were clear. That’s not a very common psychological thing, and even rarer for it to kill three people in such a close area unless there’s a creature or something that caused it.”

“Scared to death? That doesn’t narrow it down at all,” Dean groaned.

The bodies had been left untouched, so Raphael was pretty sure he might have some idea what had happened. Or he thought he could, but he didn't know for sure. He'd have to read up on ghosts.

“Hey, Adam, you hungry?” Dean asked. He pointed towards something Adam couldn't see. “I think there's something over there. Do you want to go get us all something to eat?” Dean pulled a wallet out of his back pocket and started counting some cash to take out of it and hand to Adam.

Adam couldn't see the food stall, but Michael's keys were right there and he swallowed thickly. What if they left before he got back? They could just leave. “No thank you,” he mumbled. “Not hungry.”

Dean raised an eyebrow, but didn't push. Instead of putting the separated cash back in his wallet, he finished handing it to Adam. "Just in case you need it for anything.”

Raphael stared at the money and counted it before putting it in his pocket. There was enough for more than one night at a motel and despite whatever Dean believed, he didn’t need food. Why did Dean think he needed so much cash? Did Michael think he was a burden?

Michael frowned at the way Adam was eying the cash. He was just looking out for his baby brother, had he done something wrong? “Adam, you okay?”

Adam nodded. He was fine. He wished Michael would call him by his real name, but everything was peachy.

The eldest archangel didn’t believe him, but he still really wasn’t good at talking about feelings, and this wasn’t really a good place to stand around thinking about it. “Okay.” 

Raphael followed his brothers back to the Impala and climbed into the backseat, just like always. Gabriel liked being in a car the least of the four archangels because he had gotten used to instant gratification. It would have bothered Raphael more, but he couldn’t care enough to oust himself to Michael, and being in an enclosed space with his brothers after the aeons they’d been gone was kind of refreshing.

Dean stopped at the motel first. Adam had dozed off in the car and it wasn’t necessary for the youngest to accompany them to question the neighbor.

Adam blinked at Dean when he found himself standing on the porch of the motel while his brothers were about to leave again. “We’re just going to go interview the next door neighbor, then come back for dinner.”

Raphael shrugged. It would give him time to start doing research and maybe stretch a little. He liked that Dean was so willing to give him alone time and not babysit him every second of every day. It was healthy.

It didn’t take the scholarly archangel very long to find the section on buruburu and it’s tendency to cause ghost sickness in those who used fear as a weapon. The people whose personality type could be considered jerks were the most frequently affected, but they weren’t the only ones. What was this stuff about secrets, anyway?

Raphael took notes on the section, blinking in an attempt to block out the ticking of the clocks reminding him that he was all alone. What if Michael and Lucifer decided not to come back? He could go back to heaven, but he didn’t want to. Gabriel hadn’t gone back to heaven, not since illusions had caused a rift in heaven and their siblings had fought to the death. He wouldn’t go back now, and when everything was fixed, none of them would go back then either because they liked these human lives too much. He liked being Adam, but he missed being Raphael. He was supposed to be a healer.   
  


The clock ended up being too much, and after making sure his notes were legible regarding ghost sickness, he curled up on the sofa. Raphael couldn’t figure out how long his brothers had been gone. How long did it take to interview a neighbor? What if they had decided not to come back after, because they liked that he was gone? What if they just abandoned him, and convinced Gabriel to go with them? What then?

When Sam came back to the motel room, there was a piece of paper next to an open lore book, and Adam was sleeping on the couch, blanket draped around him like his wings should have been. Lucifer wasn’t sure he still agreed with Raphael’s reasons for not identifying himself to Michael. He'd thought it was supposed to be a joke, sort of, but with how long it had gone on, he was concerned about the fallout that might result from it. With Adam sleeping, Sam took a look at the paper on the table. His brother had taken notes on the Buruburu and highlighted Ghost Sickness. Looking at the notes he’d made, Sam agreed that they were probably looking for a buruburu ghost.

Sam sat down on the end of the sofa by Adam’s head. “Hey, Raph, are you okay?”

Adam blinked at Sam. Lucifer was here. He hadn’t left. Or he was hallucinating. That was the next stage of ghost sickness. Adam reached for his brother, trying to make sure he was real and because his grace needed physical contact. When was the last time any of his brothers had hugged him? Had it been when Gabriel had left? Michael had been outside packing the car, so Gabriel had hugged him before leaving. That must have been it.

Lucifer leaned down to give Raphael a good hug. The elder archangel was surprised by the heat of Adam’s skin. Raphael was always meticulous in keeping the human form in perfect human condition, down to the body’s temperature and vitals, to keep Michael from worrying that anything was wrong with his human brother or suspecting that he wasn’t human. So why was that different now? “Raph, do you feel alright?”

Raphael nodded. He couldn’t be a burden. Then they would abandon him for good, and he couldn’t handle that. He’d left heaven because he couldn’t take the solitude any more once he’d figured out that the Michael he’d defended to Gabriel was actually nothing more than an illusion. Michael, Lucifer, and Gabriel’s reasons for fleeing had been good, but he’d still been just as isolated up there as the illusion of Michael.

Sam didn’t buy Raphael’s insistence that everything was fine, but that was when Dean stepped inside carrying whatever it was that he’d selected for dinner. “Everything okay?”

The youngest’s nose curled at the smell of the food. “Not hungry,” he mumbled, closing his eyes. Sleep was such a human action but at least that’s what humans did when they didn’t feel well. He could just sleep and let them finish the hunt without burdening anyone.

Sam looked over at Dean and tried to pull away so he could sit up, but Adam’s grip on his shirt tightened. “Adam did some research, he thinks we’re dealing with a certain type of fear ghost that attacks people by spreading a virus like illness called Ghost Sickness. It kills people by causing them to become so afraid it stops their hearts.”

“That’s an interesting idea.” Michael put the food on the table and took a look at the notes Adam had been taking. The handwriting seemed familiar for reasons beyond being Adam’s, but he couldn’t place it. “It fits,” he agreed. “The sheriff was acting a little odd this morning. Could he have contracted it when he found the body?”

“Undoubtedly. The neighbor described them as bullies who got better, which fits the type typically affected, although this says something about a second kind of person as well.”

_ Secrets, _ Sam realized with a glance at their younger brother. Adam hadn’t copied that part down on his note sheet, but Sam had seen it in the book. Archangels didn’t have hearts to stop, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t suffering symptoms from the Ghost Sickness. “Maybe. But I think they're less common.”

Michael gave Sam and Adam a closer look. “Is he okay?” he asked quietly when he determined that Adam had gone back to sleep.

Lucifer reached to release Adam's grip on him and then sat up so he could rub Adam's back where Raph's wings should have been but weren't because he was hiding. This was even more thorough than Gabriel's hiding and even the Trickster had suffered mentally while away from Heaven. What was this “game” doing to Raphael? Archangels weren't supposed to get sick and just because he fit the second type of victim didn't mean he should have gotten Ghost Sickness.

Sam stood and walked towards Dean, looking sadly over his shoulder at his younger brother. “Adam has ghost sickness,” he whispered. “We have a ghost to kill. Come on.”

Dean let out a strangled noise as Sam took the food, put it on the table, and then drew him outside. When the door was shut behind them, Dean spoke. “What do we now?”

“Before the heart stops, the victim is subjected to symptoms corresponding to the cause of death of the ghost. I called the coroner in Maumee and guess what I found out? The other two victims had the same abrasions on their arms. With wood chips.”

* * *

He had to be going insane, that was the only explanation for what was going on. Everything was too loud and too quiet in turn, and everything was either too much or not enough, and he needed Lucifer and Michael but he didn’t want them to just sit and ask what was wrong, he wanted to go home, but there was no point when his brother’s couldn’t go, and-

Wait, he could hear someone talking. One of his brothers, no, all of them, Michael and Lucifer and Gabriel, all right outside the door! They were back!

They entered the room with a great crash, showing no care for the door as they threw it open, looking angrier than he had ever seen them.

“What’s the matter? Did something happen while you were out?” he asked, flinching at the force of Michael’s glare.

“Did something happen?! Of course something happened! You lied to me, Raphael!”

At his brother’s words, Raphael stumbled back in fear, his breathing picking up as his worst fears came to life right in front of him. “What, what do you mean? I haven’t lied to you!” He tried to defend himself, only to flinch as Gabriel slammed the door shut, a loud clap of thunder punctuating the already harsh noise.

“Yes you did!” Gabriel shouted, “You kept your identity a secret, therefore lying by omission!”

Lucifer stepped forward then, his face twisted into a dark sneer. “I never could stand the sight of you. We’re here to get our things before we go back to Heaven, and you won’t be coming with,” he snarled. 

It was his worst nightmare, combined with a thousand other horrors that had haunted his waking moments and dreams all at once, and he couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t do anything to try and combat the terror gripping him. He could feel his vessel’s heart beating wildly out of control, and he knew that if he were human, his heart would have stopped from the stress placed upon it so suddenly.

As they all left through the door, their belongings in hand, Michael paused and turned to face Raphael one last time. “If I ever see you again, I swear upon the foundations of Heaven that I  _ will _ kill you, and our siblings have been given the same orders. You are no longer welcome in Heaven. Goodbye.”

The door slammed closed again with an air of finality, and Raphael stood frozen in place. This couldn’t be real, there was no way that it could be, his brothers wouldn’t just leave him like that, wouldn’t swear to kill him. Would they? Would they really abandon him on Earth?  _ Of course they would. It was what he deserved, lying to the  _ leaders _ of Heaven. _

Another round of booming thunder sounded, and he curled into himself, crying out as he did so because he couldn’t take it. His brothers had disowned him and Heaven had fallen apart during a storm like this.  _ Even Father was displeased with him, and there was nothing he could do to fix it now because he was all out of second chances.  _ Tears streamed down his face. He couldn’t hold his vessel together, not like this.  _ If they weren’t coming back for him, he could just fade into oblivion. No one would care. _

  
  


Gabriel wasn’t sure exactly what called him back. The power had gone out in the dingy hotel Dean had selected, and as soon as he landed, he knew  _ something _ was wrong. The form Raphael had so elegantly crafted for himself was lying still on the floor, almost lifeless. He knelt by the vessel and reached with his grace to see if Raphael was still there.

It took a minute, but Gabriel found the grace that was Raphael hidden away deep inside Adam’s core. He’d managed to condense himself into the smallest true form Gabriel had ever seen, and the youngest archangel was unconvinced that this true form was bright enough to even hurt a human. “Alright,” he whispered to himself. “Raphael, come here.” Moving his grace a little, it was easy enough for Gabriel to surround his brother with his own grace and draw him out. There was little resistance from Raphael, so once Gabriel pulled away from Adam, Raphael was nestled safely in his arms, no bigger than a kitten.

_ “Lucifer, I don’t care what you and Michael are hunting. Banish it with whatever grace you need to and get the hell back here. Something’s wrong with Raphael.” _

_ “Buruburu. Raphael has Ghost Sickness.” _

That made frighteningly good sense. His brother had already been suffering ill effects to his grace, so it made sense that he’d somehow managed to be afflicted with such a dangerous supernatural disease. Gabriel did the only thing he could think of. He held his brother to his chest like he would a kitten, and focused on how much he loved his brother, and wished Raphael knew that.

Michael and Lucifer flew back a few minutes later. “Gabriel, what are you holding?” Michael asked, sounding confused and shocked by that and why Adam was lying on the floor.

Gabriel was  _ so done  _ with Michael’s willful ignorance. “Take a closer look, you moron!”

Michael took a forceful step towards Gabriel. Whatever he had intended to do was forgotten as he made the connection between the true form Gabriel was holding and the vacant shell lying on the floor. “Raphael,” he whispered, almost in disbelief. “This whole time?”

Lucifer nodded. “He left heaven about the time Dad met Kate Milligan and became Adam without tearing out his grace. He’s been wanting to tell you, but was too afraid of how you might react.”

The eldest archangel took another step towards Gabriel, but hesitant this time, not in anger. “Will he be alright?”

The ball of grace in Gabriel’s arms was still and silent, but Gabriel was sure Raphael’s color was already brightening, if only a little. As carefully as he could without jostling Raphael, he moved his wrist so that one of his hands was free and moved it a few inches away. Gabriel snapped.

The hotel room melted into a single room with a very large bed. “I am putting my foot down,” Gabriel stated. “Time won’t pass until we leave this room, but we are going to take our vacation now. No more ‘just one more hunt’. Not this time. We are going to rest, and recover, and you are going to remind Raphael that you love him.” Gabriel shifted the grace in his arms, and then held it out to Michael, giving the other archangel no choice but to take Raphael into his own arms.

Michael sat down on the edge of the bed, staring at the too-small true form of his younger brother. Gabriel and Lucifer sat on either side of him, and for the first time in aeons, the four graces bonded with no holds barred. Raphael’s grace had been neglected, but his wasn’t the only one that needed this. They would be okay, they just needed a little more time.

* * *

Raphael sat on the edge of the bed, tying his shoes. He didn’t want to leave Gabriel’s pocket realm, but if his brothers had put him back in his vessel, they must have decided it was time to go. He wasn’t going to say anything though. They might decide he was superfluous and rescind the invitation to hunt with them indefinitely.

What would he do if they did that? He’d technically finished human medical school, and with Kate dead, he didn’t have anything to go back to. His brothers had made it clear they also weren’t going back to heaven any time soon, so while he could go back to heaven if it came to that, there wouldn’t be anything for him there either.

The bed dipped and Raphael had to look up to see what it was. It was Gabriel. The other archangel had taken a seat and scooted towards him, as Raphael’s shoes untied themselves and slid off his feet.

Raphael raised an eyebrow. If they were about to leave, why was Gabriel making this even harder than it already was? He wasn’t sure he had the energy to chase his shoes to put them back on. Not to mention retying them. Maybe transfiguring it into velcro would be easier.

“Penny for your thoughts?” Gabriel asked. “We’re not going anywhere, why do you need shoes?” Raphael blinked in confusion.

“Well, I mean, unless you really want to leave. But time isn’t passing in the outside world and I told Michael and Lucifer in no uncertain terms that we’re staying for as long as we need to. You’re not leaving, are you? I don’t want you to leave.”

Raphael blinked again, but instead of trying to comprehend what Gabriel was rambling on about, he launched himself at Gabriel, throwing his arms around his brother.  _ Gabriel wanted him to stay. _

Gabriel laughed joyously, falling backwards onto the bed as he let Raphael initiate the contact he’d been denying himself for months. “We’re not going anywhere,” he whispered, promised. He hadn’t been invading Raphael’s thoughts, but it had been easy to see where his line of thought had gone. He’d looked like someone had burned his house down or stolen his cat. “I love you.”

Michael and Lucifer had been basking on the other end of the bed, somewhere between daydreaming and half asleep, but Lucifer sat up, disrupted by Gabriel’s laughter. “Well get over here!” he shouted. “Now we can watch a movie!”

Raphael leaned upwards to look at them. “Can we watch Earth?” he asked in a small, uncertain voice.

“Yes! I loved that movie!”

“Do we have to watch that one?” Michael groused. He sat up and saw that his words had caused both Lucifer and Raphael to sulk. “Nevermind, it’s a good movie.”

Raphael crawled forward along the bed until he came to the other end of the bed. He dropped back down on Michael’s right.

Michael reached over and ruffled the top of Raphael’s head while Gabriel righted himself. The youngest archangel moved to rest on Raphael’s other side and snapped. A TV appeared in front of them, playing  _ Earth _ from the beginning and all of them were dressed in fleece pajamas. There was also two very large bowls, one of chocolate candies and one of popcorn resting on the floor within reach. Castiel appeared, as he had the first time Gabriel had allowed him into the pocket dimension, when he had been curious and a little afraid of why the archangels had secluded themselves. But he was not afraid now. Instead, he settled himself comfortably against Michael’s legs, and grabbed a bowl of popcorn for himself, blending among the older angels with ease. 

Raphael closed his eyes. Sandwiched between Michael and Gabriel, he felt secure and loved. His grace was nestled against his brothers, all four of them, and even little baby Cassie, and he felt at peace in a way he hadn’t for a long time.

“ _ Don't step on that fish, Castiel,” he'd whispered to the fledgling he'd taken to Earth to show the new water, water that he had painted himself. Gabriel hadn't been much older and he'd wanted to see it too. And where Gabriel went, the twins weren't usually far behind. It had been Michael's fish- or had it been Lucifer's? He couldn't remember. But little Cassie had been so enamored that he'd crawled out into the surf to admire it. But he'd been so big in comparison to those fish that Raphael had been afraid Cassie would step on them and they were so important to the twins. So he’d gently scooped the little fledgling up and held him tight with love. “God has big plans for that fish,” he’d whispered. But he hadn’t been referring to the fish in the sea. Castiel had been almost like a fish himself, splashing in the water, and Raphael knew-  _ knew-  _ that god had big plans for  _ his _ little fledgling. _

Listening to the documentary playing in the background, the archangel fell into an almost meditative state focused on the feel of that grace. He wasn’t sleeping and for the first time since Michael got back from Hell, he didn’t want to sleep. He just wanted to rest. 


	2. Happy Birthday, Adam Milligan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set between Anna and Samhain, Adam turns 19 and it's a little more than just an average day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear I was going to post this the day before yesterday, but I got a little caught up with stuff and it didn't happen.
> 
> Also, the bonus scenes I mentioned before are actually a full out sequel. Surprise?

#  **Adam’s Birthday**

##  **September 29, 2009**

 

They’d checked out of their hotel room before visiting Anna, so after sending Anna into Gabriel’s pocket realm, Dean drove. It had been well after midnight when they'd stopped in the forest so he drove all night and well into the next day.

Adam slept. Raphael had found it increasingly difficult to stay awake lately and had all but given up on staying awake in the car.

The impala had been considered as home to the Winchesters for most of their lives, so the car was full of ambivalent grace that had collected not only once they'd taken their grace back, but also from the amulet during their childhood.

It felt like a nest. Safe and warm. Raphael was able to recharge his grace in this place without alerting Michael to his presence. He slept because for some reason or another he often didn't have the energy to maintain Adam and hide from Michael.

So Raphael slept on the way to a random location Michael may or may not have selected yet.

Gabriel kept an eye on his brothers. Michael and Lucifer were well and able to look after themselves, but he'd been protecting them for aeons. That's not something stopped in an instant. And he was worried about Raphael.

Raphael was technically older than him, but his brother had been isolated in heaven for those same aeons, and had only recently left, somehow transforming his grace into a baby so he could experience a human life with his grace and memories intact.  Gabriel was worried because none of their kind was designed for isolation. Raphael appeared sane, but Gabriel and Lucifer couldn't understand why he still wouldn't tell Michael the truth. What was their brother so afraid of, and why did he spend so much time asleep?

Archangels did not need to sleep, and yet Raphael clearly could not stay awake at times. Gabriel knew his brother would just close himself off further if pressed, so he wouldn’t. He would support his brother and ask no questions, for now.

Dean drove well into the new day. Michael thought Adam was the only human in the car and while he was also protective of his younger brother, there were still certain car rules to be followed and Adam had never once asked for anything. That should have clued him in.

Dean stopped the car at a restaurant in the middle of the afternoon. “Anyone want something to eat?”

Adam stirred, but only after Gabriel pressed him. He was groggy, but Michael and Lucifer plied him with food. The smallest archangel, because his form was only a teenager, picked at the proffered food.

_Mustn’t be a burden._ It had become his mantra, and without it he would have told Michael the truth in a heartbeat. _Mustn’t be a problem._ His siblings were clearly unbothered by providing him with food, but Raphael didn’t want to eat. His grace wanted contact, but he couldn’t give it that. Not without alerting Michael to his presence. He forced himself to eat what he could, but in the end he just rested his arms on the table and put his head down in defeat.

Sam was sitting next to Raphael at the booth, and moved to swipe some of the younger’s hair out of the way of any food he may have been about to get in it. “Are you okay?” he asked gently.

Adam didn’t reply, even as Lucifer put a hand on his back, using just a bit of grace to touch Raphael’s. To Michael it merely looked like Lucifer was diagnosing Adam, but in reality he was touching Raphael’s hidden self, checking on him.

“I’m fine,” Raphael replied, brushing off Lucifer’s concern and pulling his grace away from Lucifer. He lifted his head. “Are you guys ready to go?”

“We should go,” Gabriel agreed. “Michael? There’s a nice bar over there if you want to stay awhile. I can get us checked into the motel across the street.”

With a considering glance at Adam, Dean agreed. Part of him wanted to be the better big brother, but lately Gabriel had seen especially close to his youngest brother. Who was he to get in the way of whatever they had going on?

Michael agreed and went to hang out at the bar while Lucifer and Gabriel walked Adam to the motel to get a room. Michael said nothing when a few hours later, Sam joined him for a beer. Sometimes three was a crowd, and as long as Gabriel and Adam were both happy, who was he to argue? So he grinned at his twin, and bought a round of beers for the both of them.

Whatever Michael thought was going on aside, Gabriel and Raphael were not having nearly so much fun. Adam had slumped on one of the beds and leaned against the headboard, hugging one of the pillows to his chest. “What do you want?” he ground out, wanting nothing more than to go back to sleep. Which he couldn’t do, because clearly his dear younger brother had other plans in mind.

Gabriel sighed. What he really wanted was for Raphael to open up, but Raphael had never been close to any of his siblings, so that was about as likely as Father suddenly taking an interest in them. Pressing for answers was clearly also a bad idea. So he did what any good brother should do.

Gabriel climbed onto the bed, throwing his weight against Raphael's side. “Movie and popcorn?”

With Gabriel's grace touching him, Raphael didn't have the energy to pull away or reject it. It was right there, and while he wouldn't admit it to his brothers or himself, _he just wanted to be held._ “Okay,” he mumbled. If that's what Gabriel really wanted, then the amount of energy it would take to change his mind would not be worth it.

“Would you want to see the “Under the Sea” documentary?” Gabriel asked. When Raphael nodded, Gabriel snapped. The room shifted, becoming the illusion of an Imax theater and the movie began to play.

Raphael managed to stay awake for most of the movie, enjoying the visuals and just soaking in Gabriel's grace. But eventually he couldn't help but slip back into sleep.

Gabriel had known it was only a matter of time before his brother would fall asleep, but he didn't mind. “Happy birthday,” he whispered to his sleeping brother, wishing there was more he could do.

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, this story is marked as complete. However, it is my intention to add one more chapter with a few bonus scenes from later seasons. Spoiler alert~ Emma Winchester, Jack Kline, and Jesse Turner.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed, please read and review!


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